The Trouble With Eden - Lawrence Block [91]
“Why?”
“Because Robin is a girl. And the Lord God don’t want no daughters. You didn’t know that, did you?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Not many people do. The Lord God wants a son in His own image, right? The Lord God’s a man, right? The Lord God’s got a cock, right? Well, figure it out.”
“I see.”
“Oh, you’re bright, aren’t you? I can tell that. I don’t have to draw pictures, do I? You know something? You and I are a lot alike. I think we’re going to be very good friends.”
“I’d like to be your friend, Gretchen.”
“And when I die, that will give you a chance to be with Peter.” A bark of laughter. “He didn’t used to have a cock, either, you know. But I got one for him at the hardware store and screwed it onto him. Please don’t take it away from him, Linda. He needs it.”
She never knew how long the conversation might have continued, or what turn it would have taken next, because at that point Olive put an arm around Gretchen’s shoulders and steered her toward the door.
“You have to get home now, Gretchen,” Olive was saying. She went on talking as she led her first from the shop itself and down the hall to the mall entrance. The voice she used was the sort men use when gentling horses.
Linda was fumbling for a cigarette when Olive returned. “I hope I didn’t interrupt something you were enjoying,” the older woman said. “I thought it would be better to send her on her way while she was calm and friendly, and I didn’t suppose she’d stay that way too long.”
“Olive, look at me. I’m shaking.”
“Clem keeps a bottle in back. You’re going to have a little glass of whiskey.”
“I don’t need it.”
“Don’t argue. No one ever got anywhere arguing with an arrogant old woman and you won’t be the first.”
The drink did seem to steady her. She drained the glass, stubbed out her cigarette. “I’ve never seen her like that before,” she said.
“Well, I’ve seen that particular bit of bad news in some pretty strange situations, but I’ll have to go along with you. I think that’s about as far around the bend as she’s ever been.”
“Do you think she’s dangerous?”
“I think she’s been dangerous from the day she was born. The first time I set eyes on her I knew I was looking at an accident looking for a place to happen; and she’s been happening all over the place ever since. God knows she picked the right place for it. She can live here and nobody thinks anything of it. Anywhere else in the world they’d have the presence of mind to lock her up.”
“But do you think she could be violent?”
“Now that’s harder to say. I would think that anybody who’s that far out in left field might turn violent for lack of knowing what was going on. I certainly wouldn’t be inclined to sell her a gun. Are you thinking she might come after you?”
“I was afraid of that while she was in here. I didn’t know what she would do next. I kept my hand near the ashtray so I could hit her with it if I had to.”
“Well, I had my hand wrapped around one of those alabaster owls, ready to pitch it at her if push came to shove. Which I’m glad they didn’t, as I’d have likely brained you instead of her. I used to have a good throwing arm but you lose your touch over the years. I don’t suppose she’s too likely to do anything violent. Her little performance tonight sounded like a pretty clear example of paranoia, but she didn’t have one particular fantasy to stay with. She kept shifting around. Still, I’d give her a wide berth. Goes without saying, doesn’t it?”
“I just hope she’s not dangerous to Robin.”
“Dangerous or not, she’s plainly unfit to care for her. If they don’t lock Gretchen up they should at least take the child away from her. And God pity Peter Nicholas if she decides to take back the penis she thinks she gave him.”
“Oh, God!”
“You’d think a man would get involved with her and then turn queer afterward instead of the other way around. But he went and leaped out of the fire and into the frying pan. There’s no place on earth like New Hope for being a ragbag of cripples. Well, here’s a piece of advice for you. From