The Use and Need of the Life of Carrie A. Nation [18]
to locate in our
section of the country, and wanted to take a school that winter, and then
he could decide where he would like to practice his profession.
This man was a thorough student, spoke, and read, several different
languages; he boarded with. I liked him, and stood in awe of him because
of his superior education, never thinking that he loved me, until he
astonished me one evening by kissing me. I had never had a gentleman
to take such a privilege and felt shocked, threw up my hands to my face,
saying several times: "I am ruined." My aunt and mother had instilled
great reserve in my actions, when in company of gentlemen, so much so
that I had never allowed one to sit near or hold my hand. This was not
because I did not like their society, but I had been taught that to inspire
respect or love from a man, you must keep him at a distance. This often
made me awkward and reserved, but it did me no harm. When I learned
that Dr. Gloyd loved me, I began to love him. He was an only child.
His parents had but a modest living. My mother was not pleased with
seeing a growing attachment between us, for there was another match she
had planned for me. When she saw this she would not allow me to sit
alone in the room with him, so our communication was mostly by writing
letters. I never knew Shakespeare until he read it to me, and I became
an ardent admirer of the greatest poet. The volume of Shakespeare on
his table was our postoffice. In the morning at breakfast he would manage
to call the name "Shakespeare;" then I would know there was a letter
for me in its leaves. After teaching three months he went to Holden,
Mo., and located; sent for his father and mother and in two years we
were married.
{illust. caption =
MRS. NATION IS SITTING WHERE SHE STOOD AT HER FIRST MARRIAGE IN THE PARLOR
OF HER OLD HOME IN CASS COUNTY, MISSOURI.}
My father and mother warned me that the doctor was addicted to
drink, but I had no idea of the curse of rum. I did not fear anything, for I
was in love, and doubted in him nothing. When Dr. Gloyd came up to
marry me the 21st of November, 1867, I noticed with pain, that his countenance
was not bright, he was changed. The day was one of the gloomiest
I ever saw, a mist fell, and not a ray of sunshine. I felt a foreboding
on the day I had looked forward to, as being one of the happiest. I did not
find Dr. Gloyd the lover I expected. He was kind but seemed to want to
be away from me; used to sit and read, when I was so hungry for his
caresses and love. I have heard that this is the experience of many other
young married women. They are so disappointed that their husbands
change so after marriage. With my observation and experience I believe
that men have it in their power to keep the love of ninety-nine women out
of a hundred. Why do women lose love for their husbands? I find it is
mostly due to indifference on the part of the husband. I often hear the
experience of those poor abandoned sisters. I ask, Why are you in this house
of sin and death? When I can get their confidence, many of them say: "I
married a man; he drank, and went with other women. I got discouraged
or spiteful, and went to the bad also." I find that drink causes so much
enmity between the sexes. Drinking men neglect their wives. Their wives
become jealous. Men often go with abandoned women under the influence
of that drink that animates the animal passions and asks not for the
association of love, but the gratification of lust. Men do not go to the
houses of ill-fame to meet women they love but oftener those they almost hate.
The drink habit destroys in men the appreciation of a home life, and when a
woman leaves all others for one man, she does, and should, expect his
companionship, and is not satisfied without it. Libertines, taking advantage
of this, select women whose husbands are neglectful, and he wins victims
by his attentions, and poor woman, as at the first, is beguiled. Marriage,
while it is the blissful consummation of pure love, is the most serious of
all relations,
section of the country, and wanted to take a school that winter, and then
he could decide where he would like to practice his profession.
This man was a thorough student, spoke, and read, several different
languages; he boarded with. I liked him, and stood in awe of him because
of his superior education, never thinking that he loved me, until he
astonished me one evening by kissing me. I had never had a gentleman
to take such a privilege and felt shocked, threw up my hands to my face,
saying several times: "I am ruined." My aunt and mother had instilled
great reserve in my actions, when in company of gentlemen, so much so
that I had never allowed one to sit near or hold my hand. This was not
because I did not like their society, but I had been taught that to inspire
respect or love from a man, you must keep him at a distance. This often
made me awkward and reserved, but it did me no harm. When I learned
that Dr. Gloyd loved me, I began to love him. He was an only child.
His parents had but a modest living. My mother was not pleased with
seeing a growing attachment between us, for there was another match she
had planned for me. When she saw this she would not allow me to sit
alone in the room with him, so our communication was mostly by writing
letters. I never knew Shakespeare until he read it to me, and I became
an ardent admirer of the greatest poet. The volume of Shakespeare on
his table was our postoffice. In the morning at breakfast he would manage
to call the name "Shakespeare;" then I would know there was a letter
for me in its leaves. After teaching three months he went to Holden,
Mo., and located; sent for his father and mother and in two years we
were married.
{illust. caption =
MRS. NATION IS SITTING WHERE SHE STOOD AT HER FIRST MARRIAGE IN THE PARLOR
OF HER OLD HOME IN CASS COUNTY, MISSOURI.}
My father and mother warned me that the doctor was addicted to
drink, but I had no idea of the curse of rum. I did not fear anything, for I
was in love, and doubted in him nothing. When Dr. Gloyd came up to
marry me the 21st of November, 1867, I noticed with pain, that his countenance
was not bright, he was changed. The day was one of the gloomiest
I ever saw, a mist fell, and not a ray of sunshine. I felt a foreboding
on the day I had looked forward to, as being one of the happiest. I did not
find Dr. Gloyd the lover I expected. He was kind but seemed to want to
be away from me; used to sit and read, when I was so hungry for his
caresses and love. I have heard that this is the experience of many other
young married women. They are so disappointed that their husbands
change so after marriage. With my observation and experience I believe
that men have it in their power to keep the love of ninety-nine women out
of a hundred. Why do women lose love for their husbands? I find it is
mostly due to indifference on the part of the husband. I often hear the
experience of those poor abandoned sisters. I ask, Why are you in this house
of sin and death? When I can get their confidence, many of them say: "I
married a man; he drank, and went with other women. I got discouraged
or spiteful, and went to the bad also." I find that drink causes so much
enmity between the sexes. Drinking men neglect their wives. Their wives
become jealous. Men often go with abandoned women under the influence
of that drink that animates the animal passions and asks not for the
association of love, but the gratification of lust. Men do not go to the
houses of ill-fame to meet women they love but oftener those they almost hate.
The drink habit destroys in men the appreciation of a home life, and when a
woman leaves all others for one man, she does, and should, expect his
companionship, and is not satisfied without it. Libertines, taking advantage
of this, select women whose husbands are neglectful, and he wins victims
by his attentions, and poor woman, as at the first, is beguiled. Marriage,
while it is the blissful consummation of pure love, is the most serious of
all relations,