Then Again - Diane Keaton [27]
William L. Bastendorf, PhD
Associate Director Pupil Personnel Services
More Positive Thinking
Just in case we might have been looking for a little quick advice, Dad had several copies of Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People prominently placed throughout our house on Wright Street. Part of its appeal came from clever chapter headings, categorized in sections with quick-fix nuggets. “Twelve Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking: 1. Avoid arguments. 2. Never tell someone they are wrong. 3. Start with a question the other person will answer yes to. 4. Let the other person feel the idea is his.”
Dad’s letters were an homage to Carnegie’s influence. “Dear Diane, Rule 1. January 5 is one of those days that make men older. A daughter 20 years old is not really an asset to a young man like myself! Truth in government is a must, but truth in age is stupid. Starting now, you are 17 and I am 35. Love, Jack N. Hall, your father.”
Next to Dale Carnegie’s book was Norman Vincent Peale’s The Power of Positive Thinking. Published in 1952, it stayed on the New York Times bestseller list for 186 weeks, selling more than five million copies. The country was in love with Peale’s cozy quotes. “When life hands you lemons, make lemonade.” “The tests of life are not meant to break you, but to make you.” “A positive mental attitude means you can overcome any kind of trouble or difficulty.” Dad ate it up. He didn’t give a damn about critics who claimed Peale was a fraud.
At age forty, Jack Hall quit his job as Santa Ana City Hall’s civil engineer to become the president of Hall & Foreman, Incorporated. He gave credit where credit was due, claiming every bit of his business acumen had been enhanced 100 percent by applying Carnegie’s and Peale’s tried-and-true techniques. Mom must have been sick and tired of hearing Dad list the twelve steps he learned to be an effective leader. But guess what? Within a few years he was a self-made success.
By 1969, Dad’s business was booming. Mom let her hair grow long and wore bell-bottoms. They began to drink socially. She became more liberal. He became more conservative. Even though they were attractive and, by Southern California standards, almost wealthy, it didn’t make them happier.
The problems began when Dad started inserting his self-help solutions into the family dynamic, especially regarding Randy, who didn’t have a firm handshake or “plan ahead” and wasn’t always “positive.” Toastmasters was still a form of torture for Randy, even though he told Mom he loved it.
PACE
There is no record of how Dad discovered PACE, an acronym for Personal and Company Effectiveness. PACE was described as a method to help people better understand what it would take to make more productive use of their talents while further enhancing their personal and professional success. But he did. Everyone in my family went to San Diego for the two-week summits, filled with seminars guided by specialized counselors in the field; everyone except me.
Daniel Whiteside was the director of youth activities. Neither Randy, Robin, nor Dorrie has any memory of him. Years later I found his qualifications on a website, which stated that he has a master’s degree in language arts from the University of California at San Francisco and the equivalent of a doctorate from the Interstate College of Personology.
Personology was developed in the 1930s by Edward Vincent Jones, a Los Angeles circuit court judge who took notes on the behavioral patterns of people who appeared in his courtroom. Judge Jones, a close friend of Whiteside’s parents, eventually “proved” that he could predict people’s behavior by observing their facial features. Examples of Personology correlations are: (1) Thick, unruly hair: less sensitive. (2) Thin hair: extremely sensitive. (3) Broad-jawed: authoritative in speech and action. (4) Square, angled chin: can be combative. (5) Heart-shaped jaw or chin: tends to be passive.
Randy’s jaw is wide. According to the principles of Personology, that meant he was confident, assured, and domineering. Robin