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Then Again - Diane Keaton [44]

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still maintain personal beauty and countenance. Day 13. I show love and feel stable inside. Day 14. I am bigger. Day 15. I am ready to take others’ comments, realizing I don’t know their intentions or real meaning. Day 16. I am able to bounce back mentally. Day 17. I am positive. Day 18. I contribute to bringing out the very best in people I am around. Day 19. Diane, Randy, Robin, and Dorrie all fall under my mental thought waves. Day 20. Jack is on the same wave too. Day 21. I value my flashes of creative thought. Day 22. I displace negative thoughts completely and respond to events accordingly. Day 23. I am proud of my spiritual being and the growth I have in this area. Day 24. I believe my spirituality softens the harshness of reality. Day 25. I am thin, one hundred and thirty-five pounds. Day 26. I am passing through the midlife mess and making it. Day 27. I am wise to the needs of others. Day 28. I am continually gaining knowledge. Day 29. I am the beneficiary of all that I surround myself with. Day 30. I am enriching my environment in every way I know. Day 31. I am developing my mind and using it in my continuing search for knowledge.


Days of the Week

Sunday the 2nd—BE HEALTHY

Monday the 3rd—GET THIN

Tuesday the 4th—SELL COLLINS ISLAND HOUSE

Wednesday the 5th—MOVE TO NEAT PLACE

Thursday the 6th—MAKE NEW FRIENDS

Friday the 7th—CULTIVATE OLD ONES

Saturday the 8th—TRAVEL

Sunday the 9th—MENTALLY GROW—EXPAND

Monday the 10th—TAKE MORE CARE WITH—

Tuesday the 11th—COOKING

Wednesday the 12th—BE LESS CONCERNED—

Thursday the 13th—WITH MYSELF

Friday the 14th—BE LIGHTER ABOUT THINGS

Saturday the 15th—LAUGH A LOT

Sunday the 16th—TALK MORE


Dorothy-isms

After the downhill slide, and living under the influence of Jack Hall’s “power of positive thinking,” Dorothy created her own catalog of cheerful bromides to combat depression. The itemized series of pep talks and wishful pick-me-ups had a function: to make her feel better. This year was going to be different. It was the year of Dorothy’s “Days of the Week” and “What I Am Thankful For.” Itemizing catchphrases as if they were wishes that would come true was like praying to a benevolent God who encouraged repetition as a means to an end—a cheerful one. Mother organized information and kept track of changes by classifying her adages chronologically or grouping them by theme. She did not resort to the unsorted or miscellaneous. All homilies worthy of inclusion were gathered together with some criteria in mind.

She did not pass on her Pollyanna-isms, or make reference to her Mount Whitney of words, to anyone. I suspect she shielded us from her “healing business” because somewhere deep down she knew her remedies were best left unexamined. For example, once having written “I am enriching my environment in every way I know,” Mother avoided analyzing it. Why would she? She was smart. She knew she was a harsh critic. She knew she would have been disappointed in the results. Mother’s list of platitudes rose higher and higher, all the way to the top of the biggest list of all, the “Forgotten List.” Once she forgot an idea, Mother was free to rediscover it as if it was forever and always the first “I-am-ism” on the first day of the first week of the first month of the year 1975.

Bogged down by the same dilemmas, Mom and I shared a fear of failure, a concern for what others think, demeaning comparisons, and low self-esteem. In a way, Dorothy’s bromides were a healthier version of my throwing up. After she “did her business,” her system was purged and, like me, she felt better until she needed a new resolution to help cope with getting through yet another day. As a little girl, Mom put two and two together after she saw her friend Jean Cutler write “I will not put gum under my desk” on the blackboard one hundred times. Dorothy saved her one hundred “I will have more self-confidence”s for when she needed it the most—later, much later.

Itemizing what she accomplished or, “doggone it,” how she was going to appreciate herself for once did help her weather the storm. I just wonder

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