• Choose a category
• All
• Classic-Fiction

By Root 2914 0

assumption affected their attitude toward the employer even before work had commenced. Coupled with significant insecurity and self-esteem issues beneath their tough exterior, any criticism of their work by their boss or colleagues was often interpreted as bias. In one situation, an ex-inmate employed by a car washing company accused the supervisor of prejudice when he was not allowed to perform cash-related tasks. It was only upon other new employees joining the company that he realized all “newbies” were treated in the same manner. While undoubtedly there were actual instances of discrimination, the ex-offender was also often at fault for a wrongful attitude or poor work performance.

Low starting pay was another common gripe. Instead of trying to understand the cause, such as a possible lack of experience or qualification, the automatic yet questionable assumption was that it was due to discrimination in view of their prison record. In one extreme case, as illustrated in the negative branch diagram depicted in Fig. 27-2, acceptance of a Singapore Government-assisted Prepare and Place (PNP) job and its accompanying low entry pay became the assumed root cause of every predicted future negative event in this inmate’s life. Instead of being hailed as a helping hand, the PNP job was ironically perceived as exploitation and the central potential cause of reoffense and failure.

FIGURE 27-2 Negative Branch diagram.

At Home

Fear of stigmatization was by no means confined to the work environment. Many had a long history of estranged relationships with their family members because of their delinquent behavior. In almost every case, this was worsened by each side’s tendency to see the worst, rather than the best, of the other due to unchecked and unchallenged erroneous assumptions formed purely from individual past experience, which did not allow for change. Even before release, many inmates were worried about the skepticism and perceived lack of support from family members in their attempts to start anew. Many complained about family members who would nag and call incessantly during the day or even “spy” on them to ensure they were not hanging around with bad company, despite their genuine efforts to change.

For this reason, many found it difficult to face family members upon release. Even though they had nowhere to stay, many were afraid to go home until they could prove themselves or feel of value to the household. In one case, an inmate refused to stay with his sister upon release despite her pleas for fear that his brother-in-law would “look down” on him. After doing the TOC Cloud and identifying possible faulty assumptions about his family, he took the courage to face them with his fears and was transformed when reassured of their love and concern for him despite his starting halting offer:“I have nothing to offer. All I can give is just a kiss.” Two years later, this extended family unit is still intact.

Another reason for avoidance was the fear that family members would shun them or gossip about them. To avoid gossip, many tended to avoid family functions such as weddings and Chinese New Year celebrations, which creates huge inner conflict due to the importance of Asian filial piety, family ties, and kinship. Many secretly resumed illegal activities almost immediately upon release to earn extra money for the family in a desperate effort to prove their self-worth. Without the family’s knowledge or consent, one broke curfew during parole supervision to earn extra money while another accompanied his friend on a drug run to meet household bills. Paradoxically, upon learning about the illegal activity, their families refused to believe the best intentions of their behavior, leading to a deeper spiral of mistrust between both parties.

Other family conflicts remained deadlocked for years due to an inability to identify and resolve the core problem. In an example illustrated in Fig. 27-3, an inmate was convinced that his mother hated him because she made no effort to reconcile with him for over 10 years. By simply reframing