There but for The_ A Novel - Ali Smith [35]
Is that a very taxing job, then, Richard asks, or can you more or less do it with your eyes shut?
No, you do actually need your eyes to be open for it, Mark says.
Oh, yeah. I remember now, Richard says. You’re the, uh, Hugo and Caroline’s friend.
He clears his throat.
That’ll be how you know Hugo, he says. I’d thought, before, you know, it might be the am-dram game.
The what? Mark says.
Likes a bit of a drama, Hugo, Richard says.
Hugo looks wounded. Mark can feel Caroline pretending not to listen on the other side of him.
Wildlife photography, only one of Hugo’s many exotic hobbies, Richard says.
Hugo’s pictures of barn owls are legendary in the business, Mark says.
I occasionally take a picture that’s of occasional use to publications, Hugo says. And Mark and his employers occasionally see fit to use one or two. I’m a lucky boy. What does your, uh, Miles do, Mark?
You’ll need to ask him, Mark says.
How about you, Miles? Hugo says.
He says it civilly but it sounds like a threat.
I’m so sorry, Miles is saying as Eric puts a plate down in front of him. I can’t believe I didn’t think to tell you. I’m vegetarian.
Ah, Jan says coming through with three more plates. That might actually be a bit of a problem, Miles.
What a shame, Caroline says. And the main course is lamb. From Drings, and everything. What a shame, Jan.
What about just taking the sausage off and putting it to one side and then you can eat the fish? Hannah, who’s sitting next to Miles, says.
He’s vegetarian, Hannah, Caroline says.
Yes, I know, Caroline, that’s why I suggested it, Hannah says.
I do wish you’d let me know, Mark, or let Hugo know so he could have let me know in advance, Jan says.
I wasn’t actually party to the information that Mark would be bringing somebody, Hugo says.
My apologies, Mark says. I’m so sorry.
No, my fault, Miles says. Mine entirely. I’m an interloper. Happy just to eat salad to atone. Happy not to eat at all if it’s a problem. Happy just to have an enjoyable evening sitting here.
And then he was killed by a Viking who brained him with a bone that came from an ox, the child at the other end of the table is saying. He was the Archbishop of Canterbury and they made him a saint. It is why the church of St. Alfege is called his name. It happened here, in Greenwich, in the year ten twelve.
In the year twenty-five twenty-five. If man is still alive, Terence sings.
Adorable, Caroline says.
She smiles at Bernice. Adorable, she mouths the word the length of the table.
I’m not responsible for any adorability here, Bernice says. I’m the bad cop.
If woman can survive, Terence sings.
And the church has survived and is still there, the child says, though it has been rebuilt on the place, the exact place the original church where they brained him stood.
Ours are so grown up now, Caroline says. Theirs are still small, she says nodding at Hannah then at Richard. Lucky them, that’s all I can say. I have fond memories of life BCG. Before computer games. D’you like children, Mark? Oh, excuse me. I don’t mean that to sound like it sounds.
Um, Mark says.
I mean, I don’t know that you don’t have any. I was just assuming. I didn’t mean to sound patronizing.
It is possible now for you lot to adopt, isn’t it? Hugo said.
What lot, sorry? Mark says.
Miles is talking to the child about the restoration of the Cutty Sark.
The original, he says, was really fast. She was a tea-clipper, but built when tea-clippers were no longer relevant or really needed any more, but she was so adaptable and fast that she could even outrace the newfangled steamships.
But what I wonder is, the child said, why is it a she?
Would you rather we called it a he? Miles says.
No, the child says. I just wonder why it is, that’s all.
I don’t know, Miles says, but I’ll try and find out for you. I think ships are generally shes. And you know what Cutty Sark means?
Miles tells the child its origin. Everybody round the table pretends to be entertained while he does.
So the man in the poem is a bit merry, a bit drunk by