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"Boy, it feels good in here," he said.

The woman in the shallow end called out, "Where’d Daddy go?"

Luther cocked his head back and said, "I’m in the Jacuzzi, Christie! Entertain the children please!"

Luther looked back at me, said, "So, old man, do you feel redeemed?"

I started to rise, felt Luther’s smooth legs wrap around my ankles.

"Sorry, I didn’t introduce myself," he said, extending his hand. "Bob Crider."

I just stared at him, and he withdrew his hand, unshaken.

"Please. I’m curious," he said. "You turned yourself in. Spilled your guts. Spent sixteen years in prison. Paying for your sins. I kept up. Read the articles. Your slobbering confession. Justice is served. Penance performed. Do you feel redeemed?"

"I don’t know. Look, I’m really tired. I should—"

"Whatever happened to that sweet little detective and her son?"

My throat tightened, as it always does when I think of Violet.

"She killed herself."

"How?"

"Shotgun under the chin."

"Hmm. Always thought that’s how you’d end up."

"Yeah, well, there’s still time."

"What? Being out, free again not what you thought it’d be?"

"When you’re on the inside, there’s always the outside to look forward to. But when you’re on the outside, and freedom and blue sky don’t do it for you, all you have to dream about is death."

"Why do you suppose that detective killed herself?"

"Guilt."

"Try loneliness."

"No, Violet had a husband. Lived near her family. She—"

"Not that kind. She was lonely like you’re lonely. Like I’m lonely. Like the few who understand that all this is an illusion, savagery’s mask. I mean, different as we are, Andrew, I feel a kinship sitting in this hot tub with you that I haven’t felt in years. The same truths have been revealed to us, no?"

"I guess."

"It’s devastating when you feel you’re the only one who knows this terrible secret. That’s the brand of loneliness that killed Violet."

I looked beyond Luther, at his family playing in the swimming pool.

"See you went and got yourself a family."

Luther grinned, glanced back at the pool.

"Beautiful, aren’t they?"

"They know what a psychopathic fuck Daddy is?"

"I’m not that way anymore."

"Really."

My boxer shorts ballooned. I lifted the waistband. Bubbles rushed to the surface.

"I’m a pastor now, Andrew."

I smiled, said, "Guess you’ve been redeemed."

"By the blood of Christ I have."

"You believe that."

"We all sin and fall short. Some more than others."

"Sure. Some cheat on their taxes. Some break children’s necks and hang women off of lighthouses."

"Sin is sin. I’ve repented."

"Paid for them how?"

"Christ paid for them."

"That’s convenient."

"That’s grace."

"What would your father think?"

"He’d be amused. Then he’d kill me."

We laughed. Luther’s dentures shone. Perfectly straight and creamy. His real teeth had gone the way of Rufus’s.

"You’re not a believer are you, Andrew?"

I slid under and came up again, brushed my gray hair out of my face.

"No."

"I could help you. I’d like to help you."

"I’ll pass."

One of the twins ran up and leaned over the edge beside his father.

"When are you coming, Dad? You promised."

Luther kissed Jason’s cheek.

"Give me a minute, son."

Jason sprinted back and yelled as he canonballed again into the pool.

I rose up out of the water, my skin steaming.

"What if it runs in the family, Luther?"

"Runs in everybody’s family."

I climbed out of the Jacuzzi and wrapped myself in a towel.

"Grace, Andrew. It’s free, and it’s the only shot at a happy ending you’ve got."

"Goodbye, Reverend Kite."

I unlatched the gate and started toward the stairwell. By the time I’d reached my door on the second level, Luther was back in the pool, chasing his boys and terrorizing them with the soundtrack to Jaws.

I leaned against the railing, shivering now, observing the family at play. After awhile, my eyes moved beyond them to the black sweep of grassland all around. Felt that tightness in my throat again, but it wasn’t Vi this time. Amid all that darkness and the stars