Threesome - Lawrence Block [17]
RHODA: But make it light.
HARRY: Uh-huh. The thing of it is, I don’t know, you talk about self-sufficient, Priss and I being self-sufficient. Sometimes I really feel that we are. Sometimes I feel that other people are nothing but an intrusion and that all we need are each other for company and enough income to balance the outgo. I would say I feel this way by far the greater portion of the time.
RHODA: And the rest of the time?
HARRY: The rest of the time I need more than I get.
RHODA: This is a little dangerous, this conversation.
HARRY: It’s just talk.
RHODA: Sure.
HARRY: People who connect the way we do, you and I do, ought to be able to say things to each other. You talk about being afraid you’re getting in the way, crowding us, Christ’s sake, Rho, there’s no way you could crowd us. You’re part of the family.
RHODA: Uh-huh.
HARRY: Where was I?
RHODA: Sometimes you need more than you get.
HARRY: Right, and the thing of it is—
RHODA: That you and I have a thing for each other, and you’re thinking about trying it on.
HARRY: Jesus.
RHODA: That’s where you were running with the ball, isn’t it?
HARRY: That’s where the goal line is.
RHODA: Priss is my best friend on earth, Harry.
HARRY: Just your friend?
RHODA: Huh?
HARRY: Nothing. Priss is my best friend, too. That doesn’t cut it. I still want to ball you.
RHODA: No.
HARRY: She never has to know.
RHODA: Harry, I don’t want it. The whole thing is just too heavy. If we did make it I would have to move out and I don’t think I’m ready for that. I mean I like it here and I would hate to fuck it up and have to go away.
HARRY: You wouldn’t have to go.
RHODA: I couldn’t handle it.
HARRY: I want you.
RHODA: Look, damn it—
HARRY: And you want me. Tell me you don’t.
RHODA: You’re attractive, I dig you, I relate to you, yes, I suppose I want you, but—
HARRY: Come over here.
RHODA: No, I’m sorry.
HARRY: I want to kiss you and eat you and fuck you.
RHODA: Stop it.
HARRY: Just kiss me once.
RHODA: Then will you drop all this?
HARRY: If you still want me to.
RHODA: I’ll still want.
HARRY: Fair enough.
RHODA: But no more than one kiss. Or I’ll scream. That’s melodramatic, I can’t help it, but it’s what I’ll do because there’s more happening here than I can hold together. I can’t handle all this. Promise that you’ll let me go to sleep.
HARRY: I promise.
They kiss, she and he. He tests her lips with his tongue and her mouth opens like Sesame. His arms circle her and one of his large hands claps her on the buttocks and draws her loins to his. Involuntarily her anal sphincter tightens, her crotch thrusts forward, and she feels his erection press her. She thinks of Priss sleeping a few rooms away, blonde hair on her pillow, facial mask relaxed in sleep, innocent sleep, and recalls Priss’ lovemaking, and feels Priss’ husband’s cock working rhythmically against her parts, and she very very nearly melts entirely away.
But she doesn’t. She taps some reservoir of determination, hauls herself up by emotional bootstraps and ends the kiss. Each takes an unplanned step backward. They regard each other at some length.
HARRY: I knew it.
RHODA: So did I.
HARRY: That it’s all there for us. That all we have to do is let it loose.
RHODA: Not now.
HARRY: You know we will sooner or later. Nothing is going to keep us from fucking each other.
RHODA: I—
HARRY: So why wait?
RHODA: You promised.
HARRY: I know.
RHODA: If it’s going to happen it will. But not tonight. It can’t be tonight. I have to get my mind right.
HARRY: All right.
RHODA: Goodnight.
HARRY: Uh-huh. One of our best.
RHODA: Goodnight.
HARRY: Goodnight.
In bed, she wraps herself up securely in the bedclothing and clutches tightly to her pillow. For a long time she lies awake listening to the silence. Then, just as she is on the point of sleep, she hears them fucking through the wall. Bed springs,