Toad Away - Morris Gleitzman [41]
One awful thing.
The huge merciless war Limpy knew humans would wage against anyone who scratched their cars.
When the toolbox lid was finally flung open, Limpy saw to his horror that it had already started.
The global war between humans and cane toads.
He and Charm and Goliath staggered out of the toolbox into a nightmare.
Fireballs were exploding in a dark sky. The night air was full of smoke and stench. Humans in ragged military uniforms were clambering over piles of rubble, aiming huge guns. And all around, slumped and bleeding and pitiful, were dead cane toads.
Limpy could hardly take it all in. He was dimly aware of Charm whimpering and clutching on to him.
They both ducked as a burly helmeted human, chest crisscrossed with belts of bullets, dragged himself out of a crater, heaved a machine gun onto his shoulder, and blasted several cane toads into tiny pieces.
“What's going on?” yelled Goliath into Limpy's ear.
He looked as stunned as Limpy felt.
“War,” said Limpy, feeling faint. “World war.”
Goliath glared up at the human with the smoking gun. “You mongrel!” he yelled, and flung himself at the towering figure.
“No!” screamed Limpy, but it was too late.
Goliath landed on the human's boot. The human shook him off, then pointed the machine gun at Goliath's head.
Limpy and Charm held on to each other in helpless terror and watched as Goliath stared up at the gun.
“Goliath!” yelled Charm. “Hop for it!”
Limpy saw that Goliath couldn't move because the human soldier was treading on his leg.
Charm was already squirting at the human and Limpy did too. But the human's helmet had a Perspex visor and their poison pus just sprayed harmlessly against it.
Limpy saw the human taking aim.
Goliath started blubbering. “Please,” he begged the human. “Don't shoot. I'll disband my army. I'll give up wavy mud. Please.”
Limpy tried to throw himself forward, to drag Goliath away, but Charm held him back.
“Don't,” she sobbed. “It's suicide.”
Limpy saw the human's finger starting to squeeze the trigger.
“No!” screamed an anguished voice, and Limpy wasn't sure if it was Goliath or him or both.
Then suddenly night turned into day and the explosions stopped and somebody wheeled a tea trolley onto the battlefield.
Limpy blinked, stunned.
He looked up. High above, massive lights hung from the ceiling of what Limpy realized was a vast room, even bigger than the supermarket and the airport.
The human with the gun had flipped up his visor and was picking up a very wobbly Goliath.
“Hi there,” said the human to Goliath. “I see the live ones have arrived.”
Limpy didn't understand the words, but what he hoped the human was saying was “We surrender, we surrender, all we want is to live in peace and friendship with cane toads forever.”
It was possible. The human was stroking the stunned and bug-eyed Goliath in a friendly way.
“What's going on?” croaked Charm.
“Not sure,” said Limpy. He decided to ask a local. He saw one close by, a cane toad sitting on a pile of rubble.
“Excuse me,” said Limpy. “What's going on?”
The cane toad didn't answer. Limpy asked again, and when the cane toad didn't answer again, he decided the cane toad must either be dead or shell-shocked. He'd seen shell-shocked crabs like this after humans had thrown shells at them.
Then he looked closer and saw that the cane toad was made of cloth, with plastic eyes.
I don't get this, thought Limpy. Perhaps it's me who's either dead or shell-shocked.
“You wanna know what's going on?” said a voice behind him. “Lunch, that's what's going on.”
Limpy turned round.
A cane toad munching a grasshopper in a bun was pointing to a big food trolley next to the tea trolley.
“Lunch?” said Limpy.
“Shooting has stopped for lunch,” said the toad, who Limpy could now see wasn't a real cane toad, just a smooth-skinned frog with makeup and fake warts.
“Shooting has stopped for lunch?” said Limpy. He had