Too Big to Fail [162]
Before Schreiber could continue with his inventory, Dimon cut him off. “You’re a smart guy but you’re running a fucked-up process.” The worst-case scenario that Schreiber was describing wasn’t anywhere near bad enough, Dimon insisted, and scoffed, “You guys have no idea what you’re doing. This is amateurish, it’s pathetic.”
Even worse, Dimon didn’t think that they had an accurate read of their financial data. As far as he could tell, Schreiber was simply reading off a sheet of siloed information that had never been aggregated and analyzed in one piece.
“You guys need to get a handle on the numbers,” he said. “The real numbers. You need to sit down with those numbers and figure out the size of the real hole, not the made-up hole. How big is the securities lending? You have to go contract by contract, like bottoms-up, real work. Then you need to make a list of who can help you fill it. This isn’t like, you know, you’re going to be late on your credit card bill.”
Willumstad just stared at the speakerphone in silence. He knew this routine well from their days with Sandy Weill: This was Jamie the hothead. Better to shrug it off, Willumstad thought. The worst part of Dimon’s tirade, he knew, was that he might be right.
As the AIG team awkwardly attempted to get the conversation back on a less hostile footing, Flowers suggested they call Warren Buffett. He didn’t know Buffett well, and the last time they had spoken, Flowers had tried to get him interested in buying Bear Stearns during that fateful weekend in March. In times of crisis—when a big check had to be written almost immediately—Buffett was the obvious man to turn to.
“Warren!” Flowers said enthusiastically, after reaching Buffett, as if they were best friends. He reminded him of their past dealing and then immediately explained the purpose of his call. He was staring at a piece of paper, he said, that showed that AIG would soon run out of money. He told Buffett that the spreadsheet was so basic, and so poorly done, that “I might have used it to track my grocery bill.”
Hearing that Buffett was amused by the comment, Flowers continued, “They’re a bunch of morons!” and paused meaningfully before saying, “but there’s a lot of value here.” He explained that he was looking for Buffett to invest $10 billion of capital in AIG; he hoped, in fact, that they could make an investment together.
Buffett, however, wasn’t especially interested in getting mixed up in such a mess. “You know, I don’t have as much money as I used to,” he said with a laugh. “I’m kind of low on cash.” He also wasn’t exactly sure he wanted to step into a battle between Hank Greenberg and Eli Broad, who were both waging war against the company. The only thing he might be willing to take a look at, he told Flowers, was AIG’s property and casualty business.
“Listen, there might be a real opportunity here,” Flowers agreed. “Let me get Willumstad to at least call you.”
Flowers returned to the room and told them Buffett was an unlikely candidate but urged Willumstad to contact him.
Willumstad, who had never met Buffett, called and began his pitch, but before he could get very far into it, Buffett stopped him.
“I’ve looked over the 10-K,” he said. “The company is too complicated. I don’t have enough confidence to do that. Look, nothing is going work with us, so don’t waste your time. You’ve got plenty to do.”
But then he held out one glimmer of hope. “If you wanted to sell some assets that I might have some interest in…but I don’t know.”
Willumstad thanked him for his time and consideration and slammed the phone down in frustration.
By midday, rumors were now rampant at Lehman Brothers that the board might be about to fire Fuld. With the stock trading down another 9.7 percent to $3.71 a share, the possibility was being discussed openly not only throughout the office but in the media as well.
By now the anger was also becoming increasingly palpable on the trading floor among