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it’s Sarah taking matters into her own hands by shooting Jason in the crotch with a paint ball pellet — “There are wolves in our henhouse. We must defend our flock” — or Steve calling for Armageddon with a plan to ritually sacrifice a vampire to the morning sunlight, most senseless death and persecution has been committed in the name of a god. The heretical Fellowship of the Sun justifies genocide, seeking to annihilate the entire vampire race and willing to martyr themselves in the process. When Eric steps in to replace Godric on the cross, he acts on behalf of another. But by killing Steve Newlin he would incite a larger riot. Meanwhile, Stan and his Dallas clan are nothing more than bloodthirsty gang members who would smite others sooner than make themselves vulnerable to harm, revealing that they were the ones to kill Steve Newlin’s family.

Godric, older than Jesus, ends the scuffle noting that no one in the church’s camp is willing to trade their life for Steve’s. It’s not a hopeful message of Kumbaya, but he later reveals to Eric that vampires are monsters who have only grown more brutal over time. While it’s the most evolved logic we’ve heard, that’s not to say that it didn’t still feel good when Jason clocked Steve. Similarly, Godric shows mercy on Hugo even as a traitor. This gentlemen’s law also extends to Jason and Bill who mend ways in the name of Sookie.

If Murphy’s Law holds true, anything that can go wrong will go wrong. While Sam tries to defend himself to “The Law” for Daphne’s murder, under just as much suspicion for not having a past, Andy, the unreliable narrator, steps in for Sam. He’s as honorable as Eric, weaving a tale that sounds impossible, if true. With his badge on the line, he gets no respect, not even from the man he’s protecting. And in a surprising turn, Jessica’s hymen grows back, meaning every time she sleeps with Hoyt she’ll have to relive the pain associated with losing her virginity.

So far though, nothing compares to the laws of nature as manipulated by the maniacal Maryann, feeding Tara and Eggs a psychedelic meal of Hunter Soufflé (containing Daphne’s heart) that incites rage and passion, this being the second time in this episode we’ve seen an act of domestic violence, the other being when Bill hit Lorena over the head with a television. The more we nurture an act the easier it is to repeat. Maryann would no doubt say that we’ve unlearned how to respond to our most base instincts, whereas Godric believes that to choose to evolve beyond such vulgarities is to ensure the preservation of all kinds.

A nitpicking note: why does Sookie’s telepathy always go on the fritz just as something big is about to happen? Did she not hear Luke approach? She also didn’t hear Hugo’s thoughts the whole time she was caged up with him. Both men would have been in a heightened state. If being with Bill has taught her anything, after all this time, it’s that she is not safe. She needs to remain guarded at all times.

More scenes with Alexander Skarsgård and Anna Paquin! They are so much fun together. If only there’d been a full-on fight scene in the chapel. A church full of sheep trained to kill a vamp and his sympathizer and no one raises a stake? Eric may have that kind of self control, but after all this time of people hating on Sookie for dating Bill, it’s surprising she didn’t at least throw a rousing hissy fit. We did get some satisfaction from the brief fight with Lorena, but it’s hard to hate Bill’s maker when her penance is to forever love someone who doesn’t feel the same.

Fan Sarah Napier catches up with Allan Hyde (Godric) during the Masquerade Fangbangers Ball at the EyeCon Convention in Orlando, Florida. (Sarah Napier)

Highlight: Lorena [to Sookie]: “Did you know your boyfriend hit me over the head with a 52-inch plasma television earlier tonight? Everyone says they’re so thin and light, but let me tell you, when wielded properly, they’re quite a weapon.”

Nightcap: Oops. When Jessica and Isabel cry, tears of blood do not appear. Sarah calls Jason “Judas.” Judas Iscariot was one of