Undisputed_ How to Become the World Champion in 1,372 Easy Steps - Chris Jericho [78]
It was nice to hear the groundswell of support from my friends, and even better to know I was Undisputed Champion of the World, bitch!
The WWE World Champion finally drove on to Anaheim and got to his hotel at two minutes to midnight. He was very hungry and was ready for a feast worthy of an Undisputed King!
“What time does room service close, young Squire?” said the King to the check-in clerk.
“I’m sorry, sir, but it closed at 11 p.m. And the bar stopped serving at midnight.”
It was 12:02 a.m.
The King wasn’t happy and disappeared back into my brain, allowing peasant Jericho to return. Here I was, the Undisputed World Champion of the biggest wrestling company on the planet, and I couldn’t get a damn shrimp salad.
The desk clerk gave me the number for Domino’s Pizza and I swiped it from his hand rudely, grumbling something about lobster thermidor and couscous. Twenty-nine minutes later (two more minutes and I would’ve gotten that bad boy for free) the phone in my room rang and the delivery guy told me he was downstairs with my pauper’s repast. I told him to just bring it up, but he said, “I’m sorry, sir, but our policy is to not bring pizzas up to the room. You’ll have to come down to the lobby to pick it up.”
I put on a pair of Zubaz and went downstairs in my bare feet, picked up my pizza (Vengeful Author’s Note: Amount of driver’s tip that night—37 cents.), and went back to my room. I searched through my pockets for the room key and realized I’d locked myself out. I went back down to the front desk (still in my bare feet) and told the guy I’d locked myself out and needed another keycard.
“Sure, just show me some ID.”
“I don’t have any ID, it’s in my room next to the key. Besides, you just checked me in forty-five minutes ago.”
“Well, I can’t give you a key without any ID.”
“Okay, but I can’t give you ID without a key.”
We went back and forth in the worst Reeves and Mortimer routine ever, until he finally agreed to allow the security guard to let me into my room, on the caveat that I could describe exactly what was in it.
“Well, there’s a suitcase, a toiletry bag, and two championship titles because I’m the frickin’ WWE Undisputed Champion !”
There were no Playboy models, paparazzi, or caviar for the champ that night; only bare feet, fawlty room keys, and a cold Domino’s pizza in a deserted hotel lobby. I had achieved the highest accolade in my profession, yet I couldn’t even get into my damn room.
That old trickster the Jericho Curse had returned to join me for old time’s sake during my first night as the Undisputed World Champion.
But as I was soon to find out, that rat bastard Curse was going to stick around a lot longer than just one night.
CHAPTER 22
Peanut Butter and Chong
Now that I was the champion, I knew I would have to work harder than ever. Pat had told me, “When you make it to the top of the mountain, everybody wants to knock you off.” The entire company was watching my every step, waiting for me to stumble in any way, with my biggest critic being Vince himself. I couldn’t blame him.
He’d made a big investment in making me the Undisputed Champion, as he needed to make new stars. HHH and Michaels were out, Angle had been the champion multiple times, Rock was spending more and more time in Hollywood, and Austin was already the biggest name in the business. Vince had no other choice but to elevate me.
I was eager to prove my mettle, but the problem was I didn’t feel completely at ease being the champion. I wasn’t satisfied with my work in the WWE so far, my relationship with Vince wasn’t the best, and politically I still had doubters who thought I couldn’t cut it on top.
The next night on Raw was my coronation ceremony, where Flair (who storyline-wise was the co-owner of the WWE) was going to present me with the two titles. I came to the ring and gave a heartfelt speech, thanking the person who made my championship victories possible— me.
Later that night I had a rematch with Austin inside a steel