Unequal Childhoods - Annette Lareau [174]
Her grades were getting worse and worse, she was struggling more and more. The harder the work got the more we saw her struggling. . . . First we got a letter in the mail that Melanie was going to be held back [after seventh grade]. I said wait a second, I haven’t heard anything on an IEP, I haven’t heard anything. We went through this whole song and dance. Why is this the first I’ve heard about anything? You are not going to devastate this girl. . . . You already broke her, you are not going to devastate her, [it is] not going to happen. . . . These folks are paid to be professionals . . . to recognize learning disabilities. Where the heck were they?
Note that Mr. Handlon does not say that the teachers are biased against his daughter or that they do not like her. Rather, he frames his concern in terms of the failure of trained educators to meet their professional obligation.
The middle-class youths’ parents had been to college themselves. They had more extensive experience with the higher education system as well as access to an array of information through their informal networks with friends, relatives, and co-workers who had also been to college. Ms. Tallinger reported a tip she learned from “a very good friend” who worked in an Ivy League admissions office:
One of the things I did know was that the more competitive colleges look at what is available in a high school, and if you’re not taking the most rigorous of what’s available, that’s a strike against you in terms of their evaluating your transcript. And so I wanted Garrett . . . to take the most rigorous that [he’s] possibly capable of taking.
She also noted that other parents sometimes supplied helpful information:
And then [I was] talking to some other parents that had taken their daughter on a tour of Yale and Duke. He told a funny story of visiting Duke and [a] question to the person guiding the admissions discussions. The question from the student was “Well, is it better to take Honors Calculus and get a B? Or take regular calculus and get an A?” He says, “It’s better to take Honors Calculus and get an A.”
Still, U.S. high schools offer a bewildering array of courses and hazy and incomplete information about higher education. They encourage parent involvement, but rather than rewarding parents who defer to professionals (as many working-class and poor parents do), schools legitimate and reward parents who aggressively monitor and intervene in their children’s schooling (as many middle-class parents do). Consider the following actions Ms. Tallinger described to me during her interview. Armed with the information about honors calculus and understanding her role as a parent to involve intervening in school when her child’s interests were at stake, she talked to the school counselors about Garrett taking honors courses. Moreover, when it appeared that a scheduling conflict would eliminate Garrett’s access to an advanced course, Ms. Tallinger went to the school and “fought” with educators, insisting that AP calculus and AP literature not be offered during the same period, thus ensuring that her son (and other high-achievers) would not be prevented from “maximizing their opportunities.” When Garrett applied to college, he had AP classes in three fields and honors classes in two other areas.
Middle-class parents’ knowledge of the higher education system, including courses, grades, and financial aid, combined with their own real-world experiences as degree-holders, also affected the guidance they gave their children. The Marshalls, for instance, knew that Stacey longed to go to an Ivy League college where she had been recruited by the basketball coach. Still, they said no when the school accepted her. Ms. Marshall explained the decision as an effort to help her daughter avoid accumulating debt at a young age. Stacey planned to be a doctor, so her education would necessarily include medical school, a huge expense. Why add undergraduate costs to that burden,