Unequal Childhoods - Annette Lareau [178]
Middle-Class Families: Concerted Cultivation Continues Not only did middle-class parents gather information, but they also actively worked with their sons and daughters, and with the schools, to increase their children’s opportunities. Middle-class parents continued a pattern begun in elementary school. For example, the Williams family undertook a very elaborate college search process. Alexander prepared for the SAT by taking many practice tests, which helped his scores to “[keep] going up”; he also had a private tutor. Mr. Williams took time off from work to accompany Alexander on a spring-break tour of colleges. Ms. Williams also visited colleges with Alexander, and he went on a summertime “college tour,” during which he and “a friend . . . looked at a bunch of schools.” Based on these visits, he worked with his mother to compile a list of colleges to which he would apply. Alexander zeroed in on Columbia and, in consultation with his mother, submitted an early decision application. Other parents also reported large expenditures of time and energy helping their child apply to college.
Middle-class parents’ determination to give their children as many advantages as possible continued over time. In some cases, without any input from educators, these parents critically assessed their children’s skills and found them wanting. The Marshalls, for instance, felt that Stacey needed additional support in math before she began high school. She was passing all of her middle-school classes, but she was not excelling. Ms. Marshall, worried that Stacey had a “weakness” in math, enrolled her in a summer algebra class she hoped would give Stacey a “boost”:
I had her take a summer school course . . . just to build up that confidence. I had seen in seventh and eighth grade that weakness. She was the only one in the summer school class who was taking it and hadn’t failed it. That gave her the boost that she needed. . . . She didn’t want to go but she went. She definitely went. She definitely appreciated it her freshman year because she ended up being “the best” in her ninth grade algebra class.
Even when Stacey was hundreds of miles away at college, Ms. Marshall continued to give her detailed advice on course selection (e.g., steering her away from an intensive calculus course: “I can’t see fitting a calculus course into a four-week period for someone who dislikes math as much as Stacey”), and she stressed the importance of Stacey working closely with her academic advisor. In short, the kind of monitoring and interventions that Ms. Marshall devoted to Stacey’s gymnastics and schooling when she was ten years old continued, in a somewhat different form, as Stacey passed through adolescence into young adulthood. Although she was a young adult, in crucial ways her mother viewed her as a child who would benefit from continuous monitoring and assistance.
Similarly, Mr. and Ms. Handlon kept up vigorous oversight of their daughter’s schooling. They too critically assessed the advice of professionals before acting (or not) on it. In middle school, when educators recommended that Melanie repeat a grade, the Handlons rejected that advice. This was not an easy decision for Ms. Handlon (“I come from a family of teachers”), but she felt that Melanie really needed “to get out of that environment.” When Melanie was in high school, Ms. Handlon also worked closely with her teachers. For example, despite being a happy and adept school cheerleader (which “surprised and amazed” her mother), Melanie insisted that she was terrified of public speaking. Giving a short public speech was a requirement for graduation, however. Ms. Handlon went to the school and negotiated an arrangement whereby Melanie was permitted to give her speech to a small, private audience.
The middle-class youth tended to have smaller hurdles than those faced by working-class and poor youth, but their parents made vigorous efforts to help their children surmount them. For example, as his son’s interest in playing college basketball deepened, Mr. Tallinger spoke to the coach of Garrett