Unequal Childhoods - Annette Lareau [19]
Parents also often have an exaggerated sense of their children’s accomplishments. For instance, they describe their children as “being bored” with schoolwork when, from the teacher’s perspective, these children have not mastered the material. In addition, parents can be quick to criticize teachers. As this third-grade teacher reports, the mother of a high-achieving student was outraged to learn that her daughter’s grade had been read aloud:
She came in one day [to complain] because I had read Chloe’s grade [aloud] as an eighty-six and Chloe was humiliated—because Chloe does not get eighty-sixes.
The teacher feels that the mother does not have an accurate view of her daughter’s performance:
Chloe is very, very bright and in the addition and subtraction pretest she got a fifty-eight. Her mother was telling me how bored she was. “Chloe has done this and knows it so well.” I showed her the fifty-eight. Well, she was absolutely shocked.
Parents watch teachers closely and do not hesitate to intervene on their children’s behalf. As one third-grade teacher reported, “Mothers are influenced by the PTA. [The principal] himself has said that he thinks the PTA is trouble. You know, it’s a close-knit little group.” Parents’ robust sense of entitlement is evident to the teachers, as this Swan teacher makes clear:
These parents, so many of them, are so self-centered, not all of them, but some, and it’s being transmitted to their children. And it’s almost like, “You owe me something. Now, what can you do for me?” . . . or, “You owe an explanation for what you’re doing.” You almost feel at times that you have to defend yourself in some cases.
Clashes between parents and teachers occur now and again. The choir teacher, for example, felt parents who chatted in the back of the room during choir performances were being rude. She included on the inside of the program a list of recommended behaviors for parents who attended the daytime performance, but after parents complained, the principal removed the guidelines. It is not unusual for parents whose children do not initially qualify for the gifted program (at Swan the cutoff is an IQ of 125) to have them tested privately; if the children then score high enough for entry, the parents will insist they be enrolled. To reduce problems, the principal (who parents feel is sometimes too supportive of teachers) engages in preemptive strikes, such as sending letters home to ask parents to respect educators’ professional judgments in assigning children to specific classrooms for the next school year:
The principal did state in a letter to the parents that, you know, all factors are taken into consideration but to please respect his judgment and the teachers’ as to placement for next year. Because it can get out of hand, the requests. It really can.
The level of involvement among Swan parents is strikingly higher than at Lower Richmond, but parents who are active at the school complain that it is a constant struggle to recruit enough volunteers for events such as “Donuts with Dad,” the annual third-grade luncheon with mothers, the luncheon put on for teachers by the parents’ group, and the all-school spring fair.8
Thus, daily life is not always smooth at Swan School. Parents complain about teachers; teachers complain about parents. Recruiting parent volunteers to staff the many school functions is arduous. Still, overall, this school enjoys many social structural resources not available at Lower Richmond. Salaries are higher, there is no teacher shortage, classroom supplies are ample, and the teachers can make photocopies of educational materials. Although the resources are already more than those available at Lower Richmond, they are further amplified by the robust contributions of the PTA. This organization raises thousands of dollars, enabling the school to offer a professional-quality arts and music program.
In sum, between the two target schools, there