Unequal Childhoods - Annette Lareau [229]
15. The field-worker explained the meaning of this term in his field notes: “Breaking someone’s ankles is an offensive term used to refer to how low the ball is being dribbled (i.e., at ankle height). At this height, it is very difficult to control and dribble the ball. The term also refers to the speed and swift change of direction that an offensive player uses. This can cause the defensive player to twist his ankles.” The field-worker, himself a good basketball player, also described Harold’s game as “A lot better than [mine].”
16. This term, often pronounced as “bull,” is used as a taunt here, referring to someone with prowess, but as Elijah Anderson notes in Code of the Street, it can also mean friend (p. 81). In our observations we did not see Harold engage in a classic form of “the dozens.” Janice Hale-Benson, Black Children.
17. As the field-worker pointed out in his field notes, this episode demonstrates that often it is more important how one looks or performs in attempting to reach a goal than it is to actually achieve the objective.
18. The field-worker, Caitlin, wrote: “I give her what I hope is an understanding look and reach out to pet her shoulder.” The fight was difficult for the field-worker (Caitlin) to witness, especially because the children seemed upset.
19. Ms. McAllister threatened Jill with a stick, but she did not hit her. A few days later, when I visited, Ms. McAllister reported that she would have hit her sister if the field-worker had not been present.
20. Another field-worker arrived early the next morning. His field notes record Ms. McAllister’s concern.
JANE: (smiling) I know Caitlin think I’m crazy. (I try to act as if I haven’t heard.) Me and my sister had got into it yesterday, and I know Caitlin was scared, but I had to kick [my sister] out. I was tired of her shit. She on drugs. . . . I threw all of [Jill’s] shit out of the door and Caitlin was like this [Jane stands stiff and erect, wide-eyed]. I felt bad that she had to see me get like that. (She begins to laugh again.) I know I scared her. (Jane is shaking her head as she smiles.) The kids were out there watchin’. I tried to give them the signal to get her out here. So I tell [them] to pick up the glass and stuff out on the pavement in the front. Caitlin starts pickin’ it up, too. I have to tell her, “Not you, Caitlin!”
21. The field-workers have not seen any of the children eat a green or yellow vegetable since the visits began. The dinner including canned spinach and yams came after this checkup.
22. Carol Heimer and Lisa Staffen, For the Sake of the Children.
23. It is theoretically possible that concerted cultivation, particularly the emphasis on reasoning, could still cultivate a keen sense of familial obligations. But there are countervailing forces. In concerted cultivation there is a stress on individualized choices and leisure activities, which take people out of the family into wider and more diverse arenas. This reduces the time available for family members to “hang out” together. Schedule conflicts also increase. There also are increasing numbers of conflicts as children, with voices that count in family decision making, often complain about having to sit through family gatherings. They prefer to spend time with their own friends. In the accomplishment of natural growth, children have fewer individualized alternatives.
24. Anderson, Code of the Street.
25. There are limits to familial support, as when Ms. McAllister felt she had no choice but to have her drug-addicted sister, Jill, leave. Still, Ms. McAllister’s decision was rooted in other family obligations. Notably, her duty as Harold and Alexis’ mother “to make it a home not a house” overrode her obligation to her twin sister. In middle-class homes, Black and white, familial obligations were fewer, partially because family members were farther away. But see the next chapter for a discussion of a Black middle-class girl, Stacey Marshall, who has a very acrimonious sibling relationship as well