Up & Out - Ariella Papa [43]
“Okay, I’ll talk to you, then.”
“Okay. Bye.”
“Thanks, bye.” The problem with working in an office is that you have a tendency to be inappropriately polite. I find myself answering my cell phone as “Rebecca Cole” and thanking my friends when I get off the phone with them. I hope Seamus wasn’t really listening. Maybe when I see him on Wednesday I can try to get us onto a daily e-mail schedule.
I get an e-mail from Human Resources. It’s for everyone. They are taking the soda fountains out of the kitchen, as well as fresh milk. They cheerfully mention that we would now have nondairy creamer, both regular and flavored, and a pay soda machine. This is big.
“I can’t believe this!” I hear Janice yelling from her cube through my closed door. She and John subsist on soda; having to pay for it is going to strain their budget.
I also get an e-mail from Delores. It’s shorter than usual, but no less annoying.
Hi Rebecca,
I understand you approved the color (red) of Esme’s shoelaces in the large plush toy. As this is the only size plush that will have shoelaces, it is very important that we select a color that accurately represents the brand. If you think about it, I’m sure you’ll agree that red seems a bit too whimsical for the character. I think we should stick with traditional white. In the future, you’ll want to cc me on any correspondence with licensing. If we aren’t on the same page it could be catastrophic.:)
Best,
Delores
Immediately after I read that message, my computer dings again. It’s another e-mail from her. I can’t believe that she can type another one so fast. Maybe she works on the drafts simultaneously so she can send them rapid fire. Could there be a method to her madness?
Okay, at least I don’t actually have to look at her. I take a deep breath and open the next one. Just as short, equally annoying.
Me again.
I think the first four eps of Esme are animated rather sloppily. We are going to want to sit down with Janice and John to discuss technique. I’d like you to come up with a document detailing what you think are the important plot points for each episode and ways that the animation isn’t working for you. I’ll need this first thing tomorrow at the latest. Then we can take about an hour to brainstorm about the issues together before we meet with them.;)
Thanks,
Delores
Whoa! A whole hour with her? I don’t think I can take it. And how the fuck am I supposed to come up with this document when I didn’t have any “issues”? I approved those episodes—so did Hackett. They got solid ratings and terrific press. Shit! I’m going to have to start quoting focus groups. Plus, it’s nine o’clock at night. What if I had another date? Of course, I don’t, but what if I had a life? She is a sadist. My new boss is a sadist.
And I was beginning to realize that I was something else. I was something much, much worse. I am no longer the It Girl, no longer a creative voice—or even someone with any real say into a character she has created. My office door is closed, but I know I’m going to scream loud, louder than Janice had. I have to. It is either that or call Tommy and have a breakdown.
I look around the office. The only thing that could help was the two-and-a-half-foot plush sample of Esme with the red fucking whimsical shoelaces. I grab her and bury my face in her soft belly.
I scream my new identity into Esme, for she has done this to me. I scream at the top of my lungs, but I’m pretty sure no one hears me.
“I AM A MIDDLE MANAGER!!!!!”
9
Flying Saucer
I did not leave work before 11:00 p.m. for the entire week, except for Wednesday when I went to Chez Es Saada with Seamus. The food was pretty good—I had chicken with almonds and couscous and he ordered a spicy lamb kabob—but the ambience was incredible. There were rose petals on a spiral staircase. Seamus launched into a