U.S.A_ - John Dos Passos [241]
charged up San Juan Hil into the governorship of the Empire State;
but after the fighting, volunteers warcorrespond-ents magazinewriters began to want to go home; it wasn't bul y huddling under puptents in the
tropical rain or scorching in the morning sun of the seared Cuban hil s with malaria mowing them down
and dysentery and always yel owjack to be afraid of.
-144-T.R. got up a round robin to the President and asked for the amateur warriors to be sent home and
leave the dirtywork to the regulars
who were digging trenches and shovel ing crap
and fighting malaria and dysentery and yel owjack
to make Cuba cosy for the Sugar Trust
and the National City Bank.
When he landed at home, one of his first inter-views was with Lemuel Quigg, emissary of Boss Platt who had the votes of upstate New York sewed into the lining of his vest; he saw Boss Platt too, but he forgot about that
afterwards. Things were bul y. He wrote a life of
Oliver Cromwel whom people said he resembled. As
Governor he doublecrossed the Platt machine (a
righteous man may have a short memory); Boss Platt
thought he'd shelved him by nominating him for the
Vice-Presidency in 1900;
Czolgocz made him president.
T.R. drove like a fiend in a buckboard over the
muddy roads through the driving rain from Mt. Marcy in the Adirondacks to catch the train to Buffalo where McKinley was dying.
As President
he moved Sagamore Hil , the healthy happy
normal American home, to the White House, took
foreign diplomats and fat armyofficers out walking in Rock Creek Park where he led them a terrible dance
through brambles, hopping across the creek on stepping-stones, wading the fords, scrambling up the shaly banks, and shook the Big Stick at malefactors of great wealth.
-145-Things were bul y.
He engineered the Panama revolution under the
shadow of which took place the famous hocuspocus of juggling the old and new canal companies by which
forty mil ion dol ars vanished into the pockets of the international bankers, but Old Glory floated over the Canal Zone
and the canal was cut through.
He busted a few trusts,
had Booker Washington to lunch at the White
House,
and urged the conservation of wild life.
He got the Nobel Peace Prize for patching up the
Peace of Portsmouth that ended the Russo-Japanese
war,
and sent the Atlantic Fleet around the world for
everybody to see that America was a firstclass power. He left the presidency to Taft after his second term leaving to that elephantine lawyer the congenial task of pouring judicial oil on the hurt feelings of the money-masters and went to Africa to hunt big game. Big game hunting was bul y.
Every time a lion or an elephant went crashing
down into the jungle underbrush, under the impact of a wel placed mushroom bul et the papers lit up with headlines;
when he talked with the Kaiser on horseback
the world was not ignorant of what he said, or
when he lectured the Nationalists at Cairo tel ing them that this was a white man's world. He went to Brazil where he travel ed through the
Matto Grosso in a dugout over waters infested with the tiny maneating fish, the piranha, shot tapirs,
jaguars,
-146-specimens of the whitelipped peccary.
He ran the rapids of the River of Doubt
down to the Amazon frontiers where he arrived
sick, an infected abscess in his leg, stretched out under an awning in a dugout with a tame trumpeterbird beside him.
Back in the States he fought his last fight when
he came out for the republican nomination in 1912 a progressive, champion of the Square Deal, crusader for the Plain People; the Bul Moose bolted out from under the Taft steamrol er and formed the Progressive Party for righteousness' sake at the Chicago Colosseum while the delegates who were going to restore demo-cratic government rocked with tears in their eyes as they sang
On ward Christian so old gers
Marching as to war
Perhaps the River of Doubt had been too much for
a man of his age; perhaps things weren't