Vampire Mine - Kerrelyn Sparks [72]
She started to say she loved all mankind, but she knew that wasn’t what Vanda meant. She was referring to the way her heart lurched whenever she looked at Connor. And the way desire and longing filled her up to the point she feared she might burst. “I’ve never felt like this before.”
“And Connor?” Vanda asked. “How does he feel?”
With a sudden pang in her chest, Marielle realized she wanted him to love her.
She winced. How could she be so selfish? Did she really want to leave him brokenhearted when she returned to heaven? He was already burdened with so much pain. How could she add to it? “I don’t want to hurt him. What should I do?”
Vanda exhaled slowly. “Well, if you’re really planning to leave . . .”
“You gotta dump him,” Brynley finished.
Marielle flinched. “But . . . he’s my protector. He guards me at night.”
“We can find someone else to protect you,” Brynley suggested.
Vanda nodded. “I’m sure Ian would do it. And Phil would help, too. You wouldn’t have to worry about either of them making a move on you.”
Marielle’s chest tightened. “Connor’s training me to protect myself, and he can enter my mind to tell where to teleport to—”
“Any Vamp can do that,” Vanda interrupted. “Look. I know you want to keep Connor around. That’s natural when you have feelings for him. But the more involved you get with him, the more it’s going to hurt when you leave.”
“Then it’s settled,” Brynley announced. “You gotta dump him.”
Marielle nodded as tears filled her eyes. God help her. There was no way to avoid hurting Connor. She could hurt him now . . . or later.
“And the sooner you dump him, the better,” Brynley added.
“That seems harsh,” Marta said as she walked toward the couch.
“Yeah, but that’s the way it goes.” Brynley slouched in a kitchen chair. “Life sucks and then you die.” Her eyes narrowed on Marielle. “And that’s when you show up, right?”
A tear rolled down her cheek. “Yes.”
“Don’t be so rough,” Vanda snapped at Brynley. “This sort of thing is new to her.”
Marta touched Marielle’s shoulder. “Please don’t cry.”
Marielle wiped her cheek. “I never knew how difficult it was to be human.”
Brynley sighed and propped her cowboy boots up on the neighboring chair. “I’m just saying love isn’t for wimps. If you don’t have the courage to take it to the end zone, then don’t get in the game.” She crossed her arms, frowning. “I learned that the hard way.”
“Well, don’t take your misery out on the rest of us,” Vanda grumbled. She walked over to Marielle and patted her shoulder. “It’ll be all right. Things have a way of working out in the end.”
Marielle blinked away her tears. “You’re right. I have to stay strong.” She had to keep believing, no matter what.
Vanda smiled. “We brought a surprise for you tonight.”
Marielle took a deep breath to ease her nerves. “What kind of surprise?”
“Homemade chocolate chip cookies and milk,” Brynley said. “Guaranteed to make you feel better.”
“And I packed a bag of spa stuff,” Vanda added. “Since we can’t take you to a spa, we brought the spa to you.”
“Spa?” Marielle asked.
Vanda nodded. “It’ll be fun!”
It was torture. At least in the beginning when Vanda showed her how to wax her legs. It did help, though, to take her mind off Connor. But when they left her soaking in the bathtub, her thoughts slipped right back to him.
“Time for your pedicure.” Vanda hustled her out of the tub and wrapped her in a thick robe.
“You’d better move,” Vanda warned Brynley as she led Marielle back into the main room.
Brynley jumped up from the couch. “I’ll fix her some milk and cookies.” She headed to the kitchen, steering clear of Marielle.
Vanda set Marielle down on the couch, then perched on the coffee table across from her. She placed one of Marielle’s feet in her lap. “You have such new skin, like a baby.”
“Here.” Marta brought over a plastic bin, filled with a variety of nail polish. “Pick a color.”
Marielle chose a luminous pink that reminded her of sunsets, and Vanda started with her toes.