Vampire Mine - Kerrelyn Sparks [89]
His heart filled with longing. It was going to kill him when she left. “I feel the same way.”
Her eyes softened with a tender look. “I know you were greatly affected. It made the fortress around your heart tumble down. So when I was hugging you just now, I saw them. Your wife and child.”
He finished pulling his pants on. “I doona want to talk about it.”
“I thought they were beautiful. And I could feel how much you loved them.”
“They died centuries ago. There’s no point in—”
“I think there is. Because for some reason, they’re at the center of all your pain and remorse. What happened—”
“Nay, I willna discuss it.” Damn, he regretted the hurt look on her face. “I’m sorry, Marielle. But I confess nothing.”
Her eyes narrowed. “Do you think the Heavenly Father doesn’t know?”
“Of course He knows. That’s why I’m on the list for hell.”
She made a face. “Stubborn man. That list is not written in stone. It can be changed.”
“I’m a lost cause. But doona fash. I will still help you get back to heaven.”
She snorted. “You think I’m only concerned about myself? What kind of angel would that make me?”
And what kind of man committed the terrible crimes he had? He couldn’t tell her. He couldn’t bear to lose her love. It was the only light in the darkness where he dwelled.
“We should be going back.” He grabbed his T-shirt, then noticed the mess he’d made on Marielle.
“Och, lass.” He used his T-shirt to wipe off her belly and thighs. “Doona let this worry you. All my sperm is dead.”
She stiffened. “I could have a child?”
“Nay. No’ with my—”
“But I have the right body parts for it.” She placed a hand on her belly, and her eyes widened with awe. “I could bring forth a living human being.”
He gulped. “I thought ye were going back to heaven.”
She blinked. “Oh. Yes, I am.” She reached for her T-shirt. “I was just . . . surprised for a moment. I hadn’t realized . . .” She pulled her T-shirt on.
“We’ll have to shower again when we return.” He located her underwear and pajama bottoms and handed them to her. “The ladies have keen senses of smell. I know the Vamp women do. I assume the shifter does, too.”
She slipped on the clothes. “So they’ll know what we did?”
“Aye. After they arrive, I need to go to Romatech and see Angus. I think we’re ready to face the Malcontents.”
“I want to go with you.” When he started to object, she touched his shoulder. “I’ll be there at the battle. I have a right to know what the plans are.”
“All right.” He stood and pulled her to her feet.
She placed her hands on his cheeks. “Thank you, Connor. I will always treasure this memory. How you made love to me under the stars.”
He wrapped his arms around her in a tight embrace. “I’ll remember it, too.”
“I wish you would trust me with all the pain you’ve been hiding.”
He sighed. He should have known she wasn’t going to give up on that. She was a healer at heart. Unfortunately, there was nothing she could do to wash away his sins.
Nothing he could do, either.
An hour later, Marielle sat in a corner of the MacKay security office at Romatech, listening to a roomful of Vamps discuss strategy. She tried to pay attention, but every time she looked at Connor, who was standing nearby, she was reminded of their lovemaking. How truly blessed humans were that they could share an act of love that was so intensely powerful and pleasurable. She’d known for several days that she had a complete set of female private parts, but she’d focused more on denying them and retaining her angelic innocence than on considering the benefits of using them.
She was capable of giving birth. Capable of having children, like Shanna. It was an intriguing thought, and when she glanced at Connor, her chest tightened.
No, she couldn’t do it. She couldn’t stay here. She’d known Connor for only five nights. How could five nights make her contemplate giving up an eternity in heaven? She would have to be insane to do that. Or very much in love.
Vanda’s words came back