War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy [313]
“No, no, I’ll do it all,” she said suddenly, stopping her tears. “I’m so happy!”
Her father and mother came into the room and blessed the betrothed couple.
From that day on Prince Andrei began going to the Rostovs’ as a fiancé.
XXIV
There was no formal betrothal, nor was anyone told of the engagement of Bolkonsky and Natasha; Prince Andrei insisted on that. He said that, as he was the cause of the delay, he must bear all the burden of it. He said that he had forever bound himself by his word, but that he did not want to bind Natasha and gave her full freedom. If in six months she felt that she did not love him, she would be within her rights to refuse him. Of course it went without saying that neither the parents nor Natasha wanted to hear about it; but Prince Andrei insisted on having his way. Prince Andrei came to the Rostovs’ every day, but he did not behave like a fiancé with Natasha: he addressed her formally and kissed only her hand. Between Prince Andrei and Natasha, after the day of the proposal, close and simple relations were established, quite different from before. It was as if they had not known each other till then. He and she both liked to remember how they had looked at each other when they were still nothing: now they both felt themselves completely different beings; then they had been false, now they were simple and sincere. At first there was a feeling of awkwardness in the family in dealing with Prince Andrei; he seemed a man from an alien world, and Natasha spent a long time getting the household accustomed to Prince Andrei and proudly assured them all that he only seemed so peculiar, but that he was the same as everybody else, and that she was not afraid of him, and that no one should be afraid of him. After a few days, the family got used to him, and, without restraint, carried on their usual way of life, in which he participated. He was able to talk about estate management with the count, about dresses with the countess and Natasha, about albums and embroidery with Sonya. Occasionally the Rostov household expressed surprise among themselves and in Prince Andrei’s presence at how it had all happened and how obvious the portents of it had been: Prince Andrei’s coming to Otradnoe, and their coming to Petersburg, and the resemblance between Natasha and Prince Andrei, which the nanny had noticed during Prince Andrei’s first visit, and the clash between Andrei and Nikolai in 1805, and many other portents of what had happened were noted by the household.
In the house that poetic boredom and silence reigned which always accompanies the presence of an engaged couple. Often, while sitting together, they all fell silent. Sometimes they all got up and left, and the couple, alone together, were still just as silent. They rarely spoke of their future life. Prince Andrei was afraid and embarrassed to speak of it. Natasha shared that feeling, as she did all his feelings, which she invariably guessed. Once Natasha began to ask about his son. Prince Andrei blushed, which often happened to him now and which Natasha especially liked, and said that his son would not live with them.
“Why not?” Natasha asked in alarm.
“I cannot take him from his grandfather, and then, too…”
“How I’d love him!” said Natasha, guessing his thought at once, “but I know you want there to be no pretexts for blaming yourself or me.”
The old count sometimes went up to Prince Andrei, kissed him, and asked his advice about Petya’s education or Nikolai’s service. The old countess sighed, looking at them. Sonya feared every moment to be in the way and tried to find pretexts for leaving them alone, when they did not even want it. When Prince Andrei spoke (he was a very good storyteller), Natasha listened to him with pride; when she spoke, she noticed with fear and joy that he looked at her attentively and searchingly. She asked herself in perplexity: “What