Washington [108]
In dealing with his stepson, Washington betrayed the exasperation of a hardworking man coping with a spoiled rich boy. Jacky was spurning the very education that Washington had so sorely missed. Having never learned French himself, Washington told Boucher to teach it to Jacky: “To be acquainted with the French tongue is become a part of polite education and, to a man who has an[y idea] of mixing in a large circle, absolutely necessary.”14 Jacky never learned French or Greek or mathematics, as he was supposed to do.
One reason that Washington monitored Jacky’s education so narrowly was that he took seriously his role as guardian of the Custis estate. When he turned down Boucher’s request for the grand tour, he explained that its costs would exceed Jacky’s income, forcing him to draw down capital. This “might be deemed imprudent in me to allow without the sanction of the court, who are the constitutional guardians of orphans.”15 Jacky’s estate consisted of four plantations in New Kent County, 15,000 acres of land, somewhere between 200 and 300 slaves, and nearly 10,000 pounds in financial securities. One wonders how Washington felt about this devil-may-care stepson whose immense wealth easily rivaled his own.
In early 1773 Washington decided that the time had come to ship Jacky off to college. For Martha, William and Mary would have been the most desirable place, given its proximity to Mount Vernon, but Washington found the atmosphere at the Virginia school too lax. He wanted to send Jacky to the College of New Jersey (Princeton), but Boucher steered him instead to King’s College (predecessor to Columbia) in New York. Boucher argued that King’s was located in “the most fashionable and polite place on the continent,” and that he counted its president, Dr. Myles Cooper, as a personal friend.16 It is worth noting that Washington, taking a dim view of the moral climate in Virginia, wanted to educate his stepson in the North.
Once Washington decided in favor of King’s, Jacky introduced a fresh complication into the picture. This sexually precocious youth had spent considerable time wooing the opposite sex. “Jack has a propensity to the sex,” Boucher warned Washington, “which I am at a loss how to judge of, much more how to describe.”17 It was only a matter of time before Jacky became seriously involved with a young woman. In December 1771, when Jonathan Boucher moved again, this time to Prince George’s County, Maryland, he took along three students. One was Jacky and another was Charles Calvert, son of the wealthy Benedict Calvert of Mount Airy. Jacky courted Eleanor (Nelly) Calvert, Charles’s beautiful, dark-eyed sister, and by early 1773 had proposed to her. All this happened without the Washingtons’ knowledge. Shocked by the news, they tried, at a bare minimum, to slow things down. On April 3, 1773, Washington wrote an artful letter to Benedict Calvert, stating that he had heard of Nelly’s “amiable qualifications” and that “an alliance” with the Calverts would please him and Martha. He then went on to cite Jacky’s “youth, inexperience, and unripened education” as “insuperable obstacles . . . to the completion of the marriage.”18 Washington suggested that the marriage be deferred for two or three years until Jacky completed his education. In the letter, he distanced himself from Jacky and discreetly registered his disapproval without openly disavowing him. Benedict Calvert agreed that Jacky should spend two years at King’s College before marrying his daughter.
FOR WASHINGTON, the other troubling family situation of these years involved his perennial attempt to please his mother, who refused to be satisfied. Mary Ball Washington had taken no apparent pride in her son’s service in the French and Indian War, and when he resigned from the Virginia Regiment, she commented that there had been “no