Welcome to the Monkey House - Kurt Vonnegut [36]
Susanna opened her arms. "Am I conservative enough now?" she said. "Is this all right with you?"
The appeal of the lovely girl made the marrow of Fuller’s bones ache. In his chest was a sigh like the lost chord. "Yes," he said. And then he murmured, "Forget about me."
Susanna tossed her head. "Forget about being run over by a truck," she said. "What makes you so mean?"
"I just say what I think," said Fuller.
"You think such mean things," said Susanna, bewildered. Her eyes widened. "All through high school, people like you would look at me as if they wished I’d drop dead. They’d never dance with me, they’d never talk to me, they’d never even smile back." She shuddered. "They’d just go slinking around like small-town cops. They’d look at me the way you did—like I’d just done something terrible."
The truth of the indictment made Fuller itch all over. "Probably thinking about something else," he said.
"I don’t think so," said Susanna. "You sure weren’t. All of a sudden, you started yelling at me in the drugstore, and I’d never even seen you before." She burst into tears. "What is the matter with you?"
Fuller looked down at the floor. "Never had a chance with a girl like you—that’s all," he said. "That hurts."
Susanna looked at him wonderingly. "You don’t know what a chance is," she said.
"A chance is a late-model convertible, a new suit, and twenty bucks," said Fuller.
Susanna turned her back to him and closed her suitcase "A chance is a girl," she said. "You smile at her, you be friendly, you be glad she’s a girl." She turned and opened her arms again. "I’m a girl. Girls are shaped this way," she said. "If men are nice to me and make me happy, I kiss them sometimes. Is that all right with you?"
"Yes," said Fuller humbly. She had rubbed his nose in the sweet reason that governed the universe. He shrugged. "I better be going. Good-by."
"Wait!" she said. "You can’t do that—just walk out, leaving me feeling so wicked." She shook her head. "I don’t deserve to feel wicked."
"What can I do?" said Fuller helplessly.
"You can take me for a walk down the main street, as though you were proud of me," said Susanna. "You can welcome me back to the human race." She nodded to herself. "You owe that to me."
Cpl. Norman Fuller, who had come home two nights before from eighteen bleak months in Korea, waited on the porch outside Susanna’s nest, with all the village watching.
Susanna had ordered him out while she changed, while she changed for her return to the human race. She had also called the express company and told them to bring her trunk back.
Fuller passed the time by stroking Susanna’s cat. "Hello, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty," he said, over and over again. Saying, "Kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty," numbed him like a merciful drug.
He was saying it when Susanna came out of her nest. He couldn’t stop saying it, and she had to take the cat away from him, firmly, before she could get him to look at her, to offer his arm.
"So long, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty," said Fuller.
Susanna was barefoot, and she wore barbaric hoop earrings, and ankle bells. Holding Fuller’s arm lightly, she led him down the stairs, and began her stately, undulating, titillating, tinkling walk past the liquor store, the insurance agency, the real-estate office, the diner, the American Legion post, and the church, to the crowded drugstore.
"Now, smile and be nice," said Susanna. "Show you’re not ashamed of me."
"Mind if I smoke?" said Fuller.
"That’s very considerate of you to ask," said Susanna. "No, I don’t mind at all."
By steadying his right hand with his left, Corporal Fuller managed to light a cigar.
(1956)
ALL THE KING’S HORSES
COLONEL BRYAN KELLY, his huge figure blocking off the light that filtered down the narrow corridor behind him, leaned for a moment against the locked door in an agony of anxiety and helpless rage. The small Oriental guard sorted through a ring of keys, searching for the one that would