Where Mercy Is Shown, Mercy Is Given - Duane Dog Chapman [40]
Even with all of the drama surrounding A&E’s decision, Beth was determined to fight for the show. Frankly, I didn’t have much of a fight left in me. The show seemed so unimportant compared to making amends. Even so, the overwhelming sadness of losing my show combined with losing my son was taking a tremendous toll.
People in the entertainment industry had warned me for years that I could lose all of my success with the snap of a finger. Lord knows I’d come close many times. Though I always heard the message, it had never made more sense to me than it did in that moment.
But I had to get those thoughts out of my mind. You become what you think. I had no plan to roll over and die. I’d lick my wounds for a while, but I planned on coming back and emerging from the flames stronger than ever. And time was of the essence to me, because I couldn’t shake the feeling there might be people who would die thinking I was a racist before I could get out there and apologize. There were no books or manuals that could help me navigate these uncharted waters. I was on my own to do what I thought was right. Don’t ever count out the underdog, especially when that underdog is the Dog.
There were thousands of media requests for me to give an interview on the matter. After careful consideration, we went to two of the biggest names in television news, Sean Hannity and Larry King. I wanted to be certain I would reach as many people as I could with the limited time I’d get on these shows. When I spoke with Sean Hannity, he warned me in advance that I’d better be sincere or he would take me down for good.
“If I don’t believe in you,” he said, “you’re done.”
Beth put Sean and his team through the wringer before agreeing to do his show. She insisted that he read my first book before the interview, even going so far as telling Sean she was going to quiz him by asking questions about it before I went on the air.
A&E was advising me to simply respond to the press and media with a standard “No comment,” but to me that was the same as saying, “I’m guilty and afraid to face the consequences.” I didn’t think this would ever die until I spoke. So, against the network’s wishes, I set up the two interviews, with Sean Hannity on November 7 and with Larry King the following night.
Knowing the interviews were all set up, I had less than a week to figure out what I was going to say. I sought out the advice of many trusted and more experienced advisors on what I needed to do to right the wrong act I had committed. The first person I wanted to reach out to was my pastor, Tim Storey, who is himself an African-American.
The Bible tells us that God will send people into our lives who are there to help us, but you’ve got to test them first to make sure they are who they say they are. When you test them, you’ll see the truth. Fortunately, I’m a born tester, especially when it comes to holy rollers. Some are fake while others are the real deal. Tim Storey is more than the real deal—which is why he’s my pastor.
Several years ago, long before I had my own television show, a friend invited Beth and me to hear Tim Storey preach at her church. She told me how cool he was and how inspiring his sermons were. Now, I was never the type of guy who went to church to connect with God. I felt I had my own relationship with Him wherever I was. I didn’t need a steeple to feel like I could pray. Even so, my friend was adamant that I go with her, so I gave in.
Beth and I got dressed and made our way to the church one beautiful Hawaiian Sunday morning. We sat down in the second row; I was on the aisle while Beth was inside to my left. Tim was slaying people in the spirit, praying for them and casting out evil spirits. I was mesmerized by his dramatic and engaging style. Suddenly, I got a feeling about the next man going up to the altar. I heard the Lord tell me, “Watch out for that guy.” An evil feeling came over me like