Why Good Girls Don't Get Ahead_. But Gutsy Girls Do - Kate White [55]
From that day on I understood that things like full-grain leather could compensate for a lot. What has continued to surprise me, however, is how much flash matters, even when you have plenty of skill and experience.
When I was called by a headhunter about the job of editor-in-chief of Child, I felt an incredible rush, not only because it sounded like a dream job, but also because I believed that with my background, I'd have a real shot at it. I'd been generating ideas and editing articles about being a woman and being a mother for years. Over breakfast with the headhunter, I realized after the first ten minutes that it would be pointless to go into lots of details about the columns I'd started or the ideas I'd generated. He was a smart guy, but he had never worked at a magazine. Of course, the fact that I'd been editing relevant material for a long time carried weight—that's how I'd gotten in the door—but there was certainly no way he could have looked at a section I'd taken over in a magazine and have made an assessment of my contribution.
My next meeting was scheduled with two people on the business side of the company and I realized that they might be no better equipped to judge my skills. How was I going to stand out?
I considered drumming up a presentation with slides or poster board. But I imagined their eyes glazing over as I described my special knack for creating article “sidebars.” Then I did something that surprised the hell out of me. I called a friend and asked to borrow her black silk Calvin Klein suit and I made an appointment to have my hair blown dry and styled before the second interview. If people weren't going to pay close attention to my background, perhaps they would pay attention to how I looked and sounded.
To this day I'm convinced I owe part of my success to an Infiniti 2000 blow-dryer.
Don't let any of this discourage you. As you learn to be gutsier with your image, you will find that it's not only fun but very empowering. Looking and sounding like a winner makes you feel like one.
HOW TO SEE YOURSELF LIKE EVERYONE ELSE DOES
Before you can begin to tinker with your style, you need to get a sense of how you actually come across to people—and that can be a very tricky thing to do. Quite often, especially when we're in the early stages of our work life, how we perceive ourselves doesn't bear much resemblance to how others view us.
I call this the Dr. Kildare Syndrome. When I was thirteen and used to walk up and down the streets of Glens Falls, New York, in my Dr. Kildare shirt, I truly believed that people thought I was a doctor. That same kind of perception gap exists for many of us. What you consider candidness may come across to others as poor judgment. What you think of as terrific exuberance may be viewed by others as immaturity. Since it's so hard to see yourself, how do you begin to determine the perception others have of you? There are a couple of ways.
Pay attention to the five-second comments people make to you about yourself
It would be nice if we could count on our bosses and coworkers to offer beneficial observations and advice about our behavior, but unfortunately that rarely happens. They do, however, manage to let their impressions sneak out in little ways that we generally ignore or mistake for either humor or grouchiness. When someone teases you about dressing “down” or keeping a low profile in a meeting or skipping out early on an important company