Women - Charles Bukowski [246]
We had two Marys.
“You like head?” Tanya asked me.
“It depends. Some do it well, most don’t.”
“Do you ever meet any friends out here?”
“I just did, the race before this.”
“A woman?”
“No, a guy, a postal clerk. I really don’t have any friends.”
“You’ve got me.”
“Ninety pounds of roaring sex.”
“Is that all you see in me?”
“Of course not. You have those large, large eyes.”
“You’re not very nice.”
“Let’s catch the next race.”
We caught the next race. She bet hers, I bet mine. We both lost.
“Let’s get out of here,” I said.
“O.K.,” said Tanya.
Back at my place we sat on the couch drinking. She really wasn’t a bad girl. She had such a sad look about her. She wore dresses and high heels and her ankles were good. I wasn’t quite sure what she expected of me. I had no desire to make her feel bad. I kissed her. She had a long thin tongue and it darted in and out of my mouth. I thought of a silverfish. There was so much sadness in everything, even when things worked.
Then Tanya unzipped me and had my cock in her mouth. She pulled it out and looked at me. She was on her knees between my legs. She stared into my eyes and ran her tongue around the head of my cock. Behind her the last of the sun was leaking through my dirty Venetian blinds. Then she went to work. She had absolutely no technique; she knew nothing about how it should be done. It was straight and simple bob and suck. As straight grotesque it was fine but it was hard to get it off on straight grotesque. I had been drinking and I didn’t want to hurt her feelings. So I went into fantasyland: we were both down at the beach, and we were surrounded by 45 or 50 people, male and female, most of them in bathing trunks. They were gathered around us in a small circle. The sun was up above, the sea rolled in and out, and you could hear it. Now and then two or three seagulls circled low over our heads.
Tanya sucked and bobbed as they watched and I heard their comments:
“Christ, look at her go and get it!”
“Cheap demented slut!”
“Sucking off a guy 40 years older than she is!”
“Pull her away! She’s crazy!”
“No, wait! She’s really getting at it!”
“And LOOK at that thing!”
“HORRIBLE!”
“Hey! I’ll get her in the ass while she’s doing it!”
“She’s CRAZY! SUCKING OFF THAT OLD FUCK!!”
“Let’s burn her back with matches!”
“LOOK AT HER GO!”
“SHE’S TOTALLY CRAZY!”
I reached down and grabbed Tanya’s head and forced my cock into the center of her skull.
When she came out of the bathroom I had two drinks ready. Tanya took a sip and looked at me. “You liked it, didn’t you? I could tell.”
“You’re right,” I said. “You like symphony music?”
“Folk-rock,” she said.
I went over to the radio, moved it to 160, turned it on, turned it up. We were there.
104
I took Tanya to the airport the next afternoon. We had a drink in the same bar. The high-yellow wasn’t around; all that leg was with somebody else.
“I’ll write you,” said Tanya.
“All right.”
“Do you think I’m a chippy?”
“No. You love sex and there’s nothing wrong with that.”
“You really get off on it yourself.”
“There’s a lot of puritan in me. Puritans might enjoy sex more than anybody.”
“You do act more innocent than any man I’ve ever met.”
“In a sense I’ve always been a virgin….”
“I wish I could say that.”
“Another drink?”
“Sure.”
We drank in silence. Then it was time to board. I kissed Tanya goodbye outside of security, then took the escalator down. The ride home was uneventful. I thought, well, I’m alone again. I ought to get some fucking writing done or go back to being a janitor. The postal service will never take me back. A man must ply his trade, as they say.
I arrived at the court. There was nothing in the mailbox. I sat down and dialed Sara. She was at the Inn.
“How’s it going?” I asked.
“Is that bitch gone?”
“She’s gone.”
“How long?”
“I just put her on the plane.”
“Did you like her?