Your Public Best - Lillian Brown [66]
Occasionally you may have to sit in an upholstered chair that tends to swallow you completely. In such a case, sit on the edge of the seat and lean slightly forward. Try crossing your legs at the ankles, balancing the weight of your body with one foot. See how this looks in front of a mirror.
If you are a short person, you can raise your height while sitting by using a cushion that you carry around with you inside a soft briefcase. If needed, you can sit unobtrusively on the briefcase.
The lifelong habit of crossing your legs while seated is very strong. Even though many successful public persons unconsciously do it, it is not good posture.
Your Own Space
When you are at the podium, there is a certain amount of space that you will occupy during your public appearance. Take a mental reading of the parameters of that space. Think of it as a platform upon which you firmly stand. Think of it as a little haven, a secure place in which you can relax and from which you will deliver your message.
Keep your body movements and gestures within that visual space. Regard that space as protective, and feel at home as you occupy it.
Body Language
Your body language is very revealing. It says things about you that you can’t tell consciously. Your body has an unspoken language of its own, quite independent of what you say.
When you are relaxed and in control, you transmit that feeling of well-being to your audience. When you are under visible stress and ill at ease, the audience wonders why you are up there on the platform.
Your body language can make you appear receptive toward your audience, or it can make you appear hostile. Observe the body language of the people at the speakers’ table. Decide how each one of them is reacting to the current speaker. Watch the body language of the group when it does not agree with the speaker. Notice the enthusiasm when an audience genuinely likes the speaker and his or her message. Let your body language indicate that you are sensitive to your own audience.
When you cross your arms, jut out your jaw, and sit rigid and straight-backed, your body is saying “stay away.” When you sit relaxed yet erect, arms and legs at ease and leaning slightly forward, your body is communicating openness. When you appear anxious and distant, your body is putting space between you and another individual. You tend to stand close to your friends and increase the space between you and a formal acquaintance or a stranger.
As you make your speech, study the body language of the members of your audience. Are they tuning you out, just waiting for you to be through—or are they listening with rapt attention? Establish yourself as a caring person. Make your attitude say, “I care about you; I am sensitive to your feelings.” As mentioned previously, good eye contact will also help you to send out this message.
When you are standing, learn to stand still. It is one of the most difficult lessons to learn. When you are self-conscious about every movement—when you worry about what your arms and legs are doing—you transmit uneasiness and lack of control. Pare your physical movements down to the minimum.
Upward-Turning Versus Downward-Turning Body Language. Everything about your body language should be angled upward, not downward.
Imagine two football coaches after an important game. The loser has his head bowed, his eyes downcast, and his body slumped over—frustration, disappointment, and anger etched in every line. Beside him stands the winning coach, with face turned upward, a big smile, arms outstretched, body erect—joy, self-confidence, and exuberance written in every line.
This may be an extreme case, but you need to adapt your platform stance to the same principle of being positive instead