150 Movies You Should Die Before You See - Miller Steve [9]
WRITER Elaine May
DIRECTOR Elaine May
STARS Warren Beatty (Lyle Rogers), Dustin Hoffman (Chuck Clarke), Charles Grodin (Jim Harrison), and Isabelle Ajani (Shirra Assel)
A pair of wannabe singer/songwriters (Beatty and Hoffman) is booked by their indifferent agent for a gig in a civil-war torn area of North Africa. They are soon ignorantly bumbling their way through the schemes of vicious dictators, coldhearted CIA operatives, and rebel forces looking for divine signs that their revolution will be successful.
Why It Sucks
Some “comedies” are painful to watch because the main characters are so damn … dumb. The idiocy and naiveté on display from Beatty and Hoffman goes beyond comedic knuckleheadedness (remember Abbott and Costello?) and into stupidity so deep viewers can't help but feel embarrassed for them. The financial crater this movie created virtually assured that they'd never appear together in a film again.
Thumbs Down Rating:
The Crappies
The Worst Writing Award goes to … Elaine May, the punchlines for whose jokes can be sighted several miles away.
And the Worst Director Award goes to … Also Elaine May for constantly disrupting the film's comedic flow with heavy-handed speeches about friendship, hanging onto dreams, and the evils of American imperialism. Really. In a comedy.
They Really Said It!
Lyrics from a song by Rogers & Clarke: Telling the truth can be dangerous business. / Honest and popular don't go hand in hand. / If you admit that you can play the accordion, / No one'll hire you in a rock 'n' roll band.
Betcha Didn't Know
Elaine May worked obsessively on editing the film and only turned it over to the studio after she was threatened with legal action.
Ishtar had an estimated budget of $55 million but only made $12.7 million during its American theatrical run.
Trivia Quiz
What was Warren Beatty's only movie during the 1990s that wasn't a financial disaster?
A: Dick Tracy (1990)
B: Bugsy (1991)
C: Love Affair (1994)
D: Bulworth (1998)
Answer: A. Dick Tracy had a budget of $47 million and earned almost $104 million during its American theatrical run.
SAHARA
Paramount Pictures/Bristol Bay Productions, 2005
PRODUCERS Gus Gustawes, William J. Immerman, Matthew McConaughey, and Vicky Dee Rock (executive producers), Stephanie Austin, Howard Baldwin, Karen Baldwin, and Mace Neufeld (producers)
WRITERS Thomas Dean Donnelly, Joshua Oppenheimer, John C. Richards, and James V. Hart (script), Clive Cussler (novel)
DIRECTOR Breck Eisner
STARS Matthew McConaughey (Dirk Pitt), Steve Zahn (Al Giordino), Penélope Cruz (Eva Rojas), Lambert Wilson (Yves Massarde), and William H. Macy (Jim Sandecker)
Professional salvagers and adventurers (McConaughey, Zahn, and Macy) are on the trail of an American Civil War — era ironclad that vanished with millions of dollars worth of Confederate gold coins aboard. Evidence points to its final resting place deep within the wastelands of the Sahara desert.
Why It Sucks
Sahara could have been a turn-off-your-brain-and-enjoy-the-ride movie in the Indiana Jones mode. After all, that's the kind of novels Clive Cussler writes. Instead, the movie's saddled with a halfhearted political message (why do directors do that?). If that weren't bad enough there's the add-water-and-stir romance between McConaughey and Cruz's characters.
Thumbs Down Rating:
The Crappies
The Worst Actress Award goes to … Penélope Cruz for being about as annoying and shrewish as possible. She even makes you forget how gorgeous she is.
And the Take the Money and Run Award goes to … Author Clive Cussler, who, after selling the rights to adapt his characters to film, immediately badmouthed Sahara. Dude, it's Hollywood. What did you think they were going to do with it?
They Really Said It!
General Kazim: Don't worry. It's Africa. Nobody cares about Africa.
Betcha Didn't Know
Sahara reportedly cost $160 million to make but only made some $70 million during its theatrical run.
Clive Cussler was paid $10 million for the rights to adapt the movie.
Trivia Quiz
What other movie based on