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150 Movies You Should Die Before You See - Miller Steve [91]

By Root 283 0

STARS Rad Fulton (Harry Glass), Ray Dannis (The Undertaker), Rick Cooper (Spike), Marty Friedman (Doc), and Warrene Ott (Thursday and Friday)

A crooked undertaker (Dannis) and his café-owning psychotic friends (Cooper and Friedman) murder beautiful young women so that the cooks can serve part of the bodies in their restaurant, while the undertaker overcharges the families for burying the remaining remains. The scheme is working perfectly until they target twin sexpots Thursday and Friday (Ott) and draw the attention of a gallant private eye (Fulton).

Why It Sucks

It's a failed attempt to make a dark comedy that spoofs horror films and detective films, but you need to have the sense of humor of a ten-year-old boy to appreciate what few decent gags are present. While the ending does offer something unexpected (and is far better than anything that leads up to it), to get there you'll suffer through bad acting and even worse dialogue.

Thumbs Down Rating:

The Crappies

The Worst Editing Award goes to … Whoever butchered this film in response to demands from censors. The violent and gory scenes are sloppily and obviously edited in ways not consistent with the rest of the film, and are invariably missing anything resembling a “money shot.”

And the Worst Cinematic Sleight-of-Hand Award goes to … T. L. P. Swicegood for his clumsy attempt to create the illusion of a tall building by showing actors running up the same flight of stairs over and over.

They Really Said It!

The Undertaker: We specifically agreed that I could bury Doc's mistakes!

Betcha Didn't Know

Reportedly, the film was recut and many gory scenes removed after being banned in several American cities upon its original release. No prints of the original film are known to survive.

Actress Warrene Ott appeared in over a dozen movies and on numerous television series in small roles. She started her show business career as a toddler.

Trivia Quiz

How did R ad Fulton (also known as James Westmoreland) make a living after his semi-retirement from acting in the early 1970s?

A: Motorcycle racer

B: Professional golfer

C: Professional surfer

D: Drama coach

Answer: B. He was a professional golfer and later an inventor. Another James Westmoreland, British and born in 1988, races motorcycles.

Table of Contents

Cover Page

Title Page

Copyright

CONTENTS

Introduction

Chapter One. Exhibits in the Bad Movie Museum

Chapter Two. Big Budget Bombs

Chapter Three. Creaky Classics

Chapter Four. Freaky Families

Chapter Five. Gory, Gorier, Goriest

Chapter Six. Happy Holidays!

Chapter Seven. Inauspicious Beginnings

Chapter Eight. It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time

Chapter Nine. Kinda-Sorta Based on the Book

Chapter Ten. Monstrous Monster Movies

Chapter Eleven. Mysteries of the Orient

Chapter Twelve. Independent Oddities

Chapter Thirteen. Strange Superheroes

Chapter Fourteen. Awful Aliens

Chapter Fifteen. Test Your Stamina

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