A Hole in the Universe - Mary McGarry Morris [126]
“Nothing. I shouldn’t have come. I’m sorry. I just don’t feel like walking.”
“All right,” she said, steering him into the park. “We’ll sit down, then.” She brushed dust off the nearest bench, then sat down. “Gordon!” she said, alarmed. He just stood there looking down at her. “What’s wrong? You’ve got to tell me. It’s about Dennis, isn’t it.”
“I just want to go back. Can we? Do you mind?”
“Oh, no, of course not.”
Trembling with desire, she unlocked her door. He went into the bathroom. The message light was blinking on her answering machine. She hit the play button, then sat down and slipped off her sandals.
“Delores, it’s me. Albert. I’ve got to talk to you. Ever since you left I’ve been—” She leaped toward the machine and hit erase. Thank God Gordon was still in the bathroom. Suddenly she heard footsteps outside, creaking up the hallway stairs. Then Albert’s furtive tap, tap-tap-tap on the door. She froze. If she didn’t make a sound, maybe he’d go away. Stay in there, please, please stay in there, she willed Gordon.
“Delores?” Albert called softly for fear one of her neighbors might recognize him. “It’s me. Are you there?”
No. She shook her head.
The key clicked into the lock. She watched the dead bolt latch turn, the knob move, the door open.
“I’m so glad you’re here.” Albert rushed toward her. “I’ve been driving around all night waiting for your light to come on.”
“Go away.” She cringed back as he stood over her, gesturing, weeping, begging her to take him back, to love him again, to forgive him for his stupidity because he had finally learned his lesson. And now he knew what was most important in life. “Loyalty,” he gasped, reaching to touch her.
She pushed away his hands and struggled to get up, but he held her there with surprising force. “Stop it, Albert. You have to go.”
“No!” he cried. “I’m not going to lose you. I’ll do anything. Anything you say. You want me to leave my wife? Well, I am! I have! I will! Tonight! Here, I’ll call her right now and tell her.” He grabbed the phone. “See? . . . Cheryl? . . . Cheryl?” he kept shouting.
The bathroom door opened. “Is everything all right?” Gordon asked.
“It’s Albert,” she said weakly.
“Oh, my God! Oh, my God,” Albert whimpered in his lunge out the door.
She got up and closed it, locked it again. Neither looked at the other as his footsteps echoed down the stairs.
“I better go,” Gordon said.
“No! No, wait. You don’t understand,” she said, determined to stay between him and the door. “It’s not what you think. He was upset. He—”
“He said you want him to leave his wife.” He spoke slowly as if to make her understand.
“Well, I don’t! Of course I don’t!”
“He said he loved you.”
“He was upset. He didn’t know what he was saying. Everything’s falling apart, his whole life. He needs help. He wants me to help him, that’s all. That’s why he came.” She could see he didn’t believe her.
“Well, anyway, I better go now.” His face was a mask again, uncaring, impenetrable. He reached for the knob.
“Don’t do this to me. Don’t. Please. Let me explain. At least let me do that,” she whispered.
He seemed to be looking at her, though his eyes were fixed and lightless. She wanted him to know the truth, not how quickly the affair had begun or how easily seduced she had been days after Albert’s return from Disney World, but how much she had admired Albert’s clever business mind and how in trying to be a caring employee and friend, she had become too deeply involved in his stressful life, all the while not only expecting, but insisting that his first responsibility always be to his family. And in this pathetic way she had considered herself part of that family. A most vital part. For she regarded herself as the cog, the one who made all things possible for Albert, his wife and children. She made sure he never went home angry at any of them. She saw to it that his business thrived. Many’s the time she had played devil’s advocate to get him to see his daughter’s or son’s side in a squabble. She knew it sounded as if she were making excuses, but she had only herself to blame.