Becoming Madame Mao - Anchee Min [125]
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The lady of the mansion, Shang-guan Yun-zhu, has been trying to contact her lover Mao since morning. She wants to tell him that she has been reading poems about the Great Void. She is tired of her role as a mistress and is sick of the endless waiting. She wants to tell him how she misses acting. She has been watching movies produced by the Shanghai Film Studio and has recognized roles which originally were created for her. She wants to tell him about the threatening calls from Jiang Ching's agents asking her to "count her days." But she can't reach Mao—her phone has been disconnected and her maids have disappeared.
Shadows are cast over Shang-guan's mind. She senses her own ending. She imagines Madame Mao Jiang Ching's laughter as she recites a thirteenth-century verse:
Flower-gathering girls have dropped out of sight
Suddenly
For sightseeing I feel disinclined
Rover that I am
I rush through all the scenes
Grief deprives me of what pleasure I can find
Last year
Swallows flew away horizon-far
Who on earth knows in whose house this year they are
Stop, will you?
Don't listen to the rain at night in the third moon
For it cannot help blossoms to appear soon
It's time, she murmurs, slowly closing the book.
They were in the middle of lovemaking. Mao was sitting on a sofa and Shang-guan Yun-zhu was on his lap. He was enjoying photographs of her movies, the roles she had played. You are a pearl.
She smiled and bent over. A string of fresh jasmine dangled from her ears.
He grabs her and begins to undress her.
She feels him and feels her love for him.
Don't be sad, I'll make it work someday, he says.
She shook her head. I am afraid.
Oh, heaven! How I miss you! Have mercy. Come on. Oh, you cold beauty. You're stone-hearted.
The more he caressed her the sadder she became. What about tomorrow? Yet she dared not ask. She had asked before and it had driven him away.
Shang-guan was flattered but concerned when Mao first pursued her. At first she refused to be disloyal to her husband, Mr. Woo, an associate director, a humble man at the Shanghai Film Studio. But it didn't stop Mao. Soon the problem was solved by Kang Sheng. Mr. Woo offered his wife. The next problem was Madame Mao Jiang Ching. Shang-guan was not able to overcome her fear, to which task Mao again assigned Kang Sheng. Kang Sheng kept Shang-guan a secret from Jiang Ching until he learned that Mao and Jiang Ching had reunited—Mao didn't mind sacrificing Shang-guan in order to please Jiang Ching.
It was not that Shang-guan lacked perspective. She had entered show business at a young age and had learned its nature. She knew what she was doing. She was thirty-five years old when she met Mao. She had her own plan. Her career as a screen actress had peaked and she was looking for an alternative. She took up with Mao when Kang Sheng convinced her that Jiang Ching was out of favor and was unsuitable as a political wife. Kang Sheng's analysis was thorough and inspiring. The idea of becoming Madame Mao made Shang-guan Yun-zhu abandon her husband and career.
Shang-guan left Shanghai, stepped into Mao's palace and put on the costume of Lady Xiang-fei. However, she soon discovered that she was not the only one Mao kept.
Shang-guan had wanted to get out, but Kang Sheng's private eyes were everywhere. It is a national affair you are conducting, he warned her. We must guard you twenty-four hours a day. You ought to have no reason to be bored. Making yourself available to the Chairman should be the only goal in your life.
But Mao hasn't shown up for a long time! He has lost interest and has turned away, don't you see?
It is your duty to wait, the cold voice continued.
She waited, through the long winter and summer. Mao never came. When the Cultural Revolution began and Shang-guan Yun-zhu saw the picture of Mao and Jiang Ching standing shoulder to shoulder on the