Bike Snob - Anonymous [32]
Exposing Yourself:
Be Seen on Your Bike
As a cyclist and a selfish person, I’d like things to be better for me. And if that works out for others too, then great. Some things I’d like are more and better bike lanes, more respect from motorists, better bike parking, and traffic laws that work for cyclists as well as drivers. However, as a curmudgeon and a person who likes to keep to himself, I don’t want to actually have to do anything to make these things happen. And I think this is okay. I know my place, and civic involvement is not it. Not only do I get very uncomfortable around people who wear wool socks with sandals, but I’m also very reluctant to make commitments that cut into my cycling and TV time. Fortunately, there are organizations all over the country that lobby for these things on my behalf. They’re staffed by people in wool socks and sandals who are unconcerned with missing TV shows because, as they’ll remind you as often as they can, they don’t own TVs. As much as I appreciate them, I have no intention of joining them.
While this may seem apathetic, I stand by my attitude. It’s better for everybody that I don’t get involved. I’m a complainer, not a fighter, and I’m a pessimist, not an activist. I believe that by simply being cyclists and riding our bikes we’re actually doing as much for cycling as anybody. This is part of the beauty of cycling—all it really takes to be a cycling advocate is to ride your bike. That’s your only responsibility. The more people who are out there riding bikes, the more cycling benefits. Hey, if you want to join a cycling advocacy group go right ahead, but you should only do it if you find that sort of thing fun in the first place. Some people like to mix politics in with their cycling, just as others like to mix in science and data by putting power meters on their bikes and downloading their rides. In both cases, the clinical term is “geeking out.” Both are fine, but neither makes you a “better” cyclist—or a better person.
Change will come for cyclists the same way it came for clothing. Not too long ago you were a dirtbag if you didn’t wear a hat and a suit or an ankle-length dress, and you had to swim in what is now formal wear. But more and more people started dressing down, and now you can wear T-shirts and jeans to work. (Well, not to all jobs, but given the economic meltdown I’m not sure how much longer the jobs that require dressing up are going to exist.) And we didn’t need a Martin Luther King, Jr., of T-shirts, either. All we needed was to wear the damn things whenever we wanted to. Yes, the T-shirt was a cultural revolution! “From underwear to formal wear!” would have been its slogan if it needed one.
It’s the same thing with cycling. If you’re in an office building and you look like you’ve been riding a bike people think you’re weird in a way they don’t even if you’re wearing a leather jacket and carrying a motorcycle helmet under your arm. If the motorcyclists can do it, so can we! (Plus, their outfits double as fetish clothing in some circles.) Right now cycling as a form of transportation is where swim-wear was in like 1890, but that will change. What put rock music on the airwaves? What got nudity on television? What allowed salsa to join the “canon of condiments”? More and more people listening to it, doing it, and eating it. The more people see of something, the more accepting they are of it. Yesteryear’s porn is today’s modest cleavage. So come on, cyclists, show ‘em your tits! People need to see you riding your bike to work. They need to get used to seeing bikes locked up outside of stores, bars, and courthouses. (I always ride my bike to court when Barbara Walters files another restraining order. She calls it stalking; I call it showing my appreciation.) Eventually, they’ll look for cyclists before turning, merging, or stopping because they’ll know we’re always there, just like the woman who keeps falling into the toilet will eventually