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Bike Snob - Anonymous [35]

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killed me back there?” Sometimes, the driver will actually be contrite. (Sadly, sometimes it also backfires, since the driver will occasionally say something like, “So what? You should be on the sidewalk anyway,” which is like squirting kerosene on a barbecue in terms of my anger.) Even ridicule is better than anger. It’s hard to do when you’re angry, but when done right it at least stalls the driver long enough so that they don’t have time for an angry retort and are forced to actually consider what they’ve done. I once asked a speeding driver who passed me dangerously if he was a surgeon. When he asked why, I explained, “Someone’s life must be on the line for you to have almost killed me back there. You must be tremendously important.” He became tongue-tied and embarrassed instead of self-righteous and angry.

And naturally, the biggest risk in approaching any driver is that you never know just how crazy they are. The honking SUV driver may be a cow, but there is such a thing as Mad Cow Disease, and some cows will attack. Avoiding confrontation is probably the smartest approach of all.

Riding in Traffic Without Getting Killed

Be Confident

Telling someone to be confident is kind of like telling someone to be taller; it’s not really something you can do on command. However, you can acquire confidence on the bike over time, and the safest way to ride is assertively, not tentatively. It’s like carrying a couple of full cocktail glasses: if you look straight ahead and walk steadily, you won’t spill a drop; if you keep looking down and worrying about spilling them, you will.

Don’t Ride Next to Cars at Intersections

Probably the most common driver/cyclist encounter I witness and experience is drivers turning into cyclists they don’t see. Sure, it would be nice if drivers turned their heads occasionally, but I don’t see that happening anytime soon. In the meantime, when you approach an intersection think of the cars as affectionate cats that are going to try to rub themselves against you.

Watch Out for Doors

There are few cyclists who have not had an unfortunate encounter with a swiftly opening car door at some point. For some reason, drivers love to fling their doors open dramatically—I always expect Bette Midler to burst out and start singing show tunes. Dooring is an especially big problem in big cities like New York, but really it happens everywhere. So keep it in mind, because those doors always seem to pop open and those cankles always seem to pop out when you least expect it.

Use Lights

It strikes me as odd that many cyclists don’t use lights at night. Of course, the bicycle industry is at least partially to blame—bikes are pretty much the only form of transportation for which lights are an aftermarket item. (Reflectors don’t count—what’s the point of lighting that depends entirely on other lights?) Besides bicycles, the only fast-moving objects that don’t use lights are missiles, bullets, and bombs, all of which are designed to take people by surprise and run into them. Unless that’s your goal on the bike, too, you should probably use a light.

CYCLING AND THE CITY

The Gentrification of the Bicycle

As a child growing up in pre-gentrification Boerum Hill, Brooklyn, I went everywhere by bicycle. My bike was in many ways the key to my neighborhood, which, at the time, was Boerum Hill, Brooklyn. This was in the ‘60s and ‘70s, before all the white people and restaurants. I really can’t underscore boldly enough the fact that I grew up in Boerum Hill, Brooklyn, before it was gentrified. You could get mugged!

—Jonathan Lethem

For years people have been talking about “gentrification.” Basically, gentrification is when some poor, or boring, or regular, or otherwise unremarkable neighborhood experiences an influx of bars and restaurants and clubs and young people and becomes annoying. It’s like going to the same supermarket day after day for years, until one day you show up, there’s an entire section dedicated to exotic foods that cost over $20, and all the employees are speaking with that mid-Atlantic

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