Cannot Wait to Get to Heaven - Fannie Flagg [42]
“Hello there, Elner,” she said. “I’ve been waiting for you!”
If Elner hadn’t believed it was her, she would have recognized that voice anywhere.
“Well, it is you!”
“Yes, it’s me!” said Dorothy, clapping her hands in delight. “Surprised?”
“Just as surprised as I can be.”
After they had hugged, Elner said, “Oh my heavens. Ida never told me a thing, I had no idea I’d be seeing you again. Let me just sit down and look at you.” She went over to the chair across from Dorothy’s and just stared at her, shaking her head in amazement.
“Well…if you are not a sight for sore eyes, I don’t know who is. For land’s sake, how are you?”
“Oh, just wonderful, Elner, and how are you?”
Elner shook her head and laughed. “Honey, to tell you the truth, at this point I have no idea. Evidently I’m dead, but I haven’t the slightest idea what is going on. All Ida told me was that I was going to meet my Maker. Am I in the right place?”
Dorothy smiled. “You are indeed, and you don’t know how happy I am to see you, Elner.”
“Me too, it’s been too long, and you look great.”
“Thank you, Elner. So do you.”
“Oh well,” she laughed. “I’ve gained a few pounds since I last saw you, but I feel fine…except I just fell out of my fig tree, that’s why I’m in this old robe, I hadn’t even gotten dressed for the day yet.”
“I know,” said Dorothy sympathetically. “You took a bad fall.”
“I did, didn’t I? But I don’t think I broke anything. Nothing hurts so far.”
“Good, we don’t want any broken bones.”
Elner sat back in her chair, crossed her feet, and looked around the room and noticed Dorothy’s two yellow canary birds, Dumpling and Moe, were as fat as ever and still chirping away in their cage, and the milk-glass chandelier still hung over the dining room table, with the floral swag curtains. “The place looks just the same. I always loved your house, Dorothy.”
“I know you did.”
“And I loved your show too, everybody missed you so much when you went off the air. There’s never been a better show than yours. Now they have Bud and Jay on in the morning, and they’re pretty good, but they don’t give out recipes like you used to.”
“No, those were the good old days….”
Elner looked around and said, “I smell something good, you don’t just happen to have a cake in the oven, do you?”
“I do,” said Dorothy. “A caramel cake, and as soon as it is done, you and I are going to have some.”
“Oh boy, caramel cake, my favorite.”
“I know, I remembered.”
“So,” said Elner, very happy at the thought of the upcoming cake, “am I in some sort of a holding pattern, resting up, having a little snack, before I go on to my final destination?”
Dorothy smiled and said, “No, honey, this is it.”
“It is?” said a surprised Elner. “Now I’m all confused…. Are you the one I’m supposed to see? You’re not the Maker, are you?”
Dorothy laughed. “Yes, one of them, at least, there are actually two of us, but I wanted a chance to say hello to you first, before we went in for our meeting. You were always one of my favorite people. I always got the biggest kick out of you, always asking those crazy questions.”
“Well, thank you,” she said. “You were always one of mine, but…I always thought you were just a regular person, it never occurred to me that you were anything other than just my friend, now I’m just mortified…I never dreamed you were…well, who you are. Will that count against me?”