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though, there is some evidence that humans are evolving in a more monogamous direction. Given the size of a man’s testicles, the amount of sperm that he produces is on the lower end of the scale compared to other mammals, which means that our ancestors’ testicles were probably producing a lot more sperm than we are today. This is likely a sign of decreasing sexual competition and stronger pair-bonds. Men also store fewer sperm than other animals, and fully 25 percent of a man’s sperm is defective on average compared to only 5 percent for chimps. When it comes to multiple ejaculations, men are the ninety-eight-pound weaklings of the animal kingdom. A male chimpanzee can ejaculate five times in five hours and still have more than half his sperm stored in his testicles. The mighty and aptly named ram can ejaculate thirty to forty times a day, and each ejaculation contains more than eight times the amount of sperm that the average man produces in one ejaculation (and that’s leaving aside the fact that the man will need a nap before he even thinks about round two, let alone round forty).

On a side note, despite their anxieties, men can be quite proud of how their penises stack up against the primate competition. The average erect penis is a little under six inches with a circumference slightly under five inches (although most studies of male penis size are exaggerated because they rely on self-reported measurements). By comparison, the chimp has an erect penis of three inches. The orangutan measures a measly one and a half inches. And the mighty gorilla weighs in with a tiny one-and-a-quarter-inch penis (if you go outside the primate world, the lowly slug turns out to be the genital giant of our planet—at least in relation to body size—having a penis that is several times longer than its actual body!). Biologists are still arguing about why men have such large penises. It seems that the most likely answer has nothing to do with procreation but is about what is called a “threat display.” In other words, the penis probably once functioned much as a stag’s antlers do—as a visible display of masculinity (at least until pants became widespread).

But to return to the original question, why has our society chosen monogamy when there are so many signs of our tendency toward polygamy? The answer is the same as that discussed in the last chapter: the survival of children. Monogamy becomes more prevalent in an environment where food is scarce, and predators are common. By increasing the bonds between husband and wife, monogamy also increases the certainty of the paternity of the children, which in turn increases the willingness of the father to play a larger role in providing for his family.

MONOGAMY’S WINNERS AND LOSERS

Most women reading this are probably thinking what a good thing it is that polygamy was ditched in favor of monogamy. And there are probably a few men reading this who are feeling nostalgic for a time when men could be men and have as many wives as they could support. But the irony is that monogamy tends to benefit most men and hurt most women. One economist has even called anti-polygamy laws a kind of male cartel undermining women’s bargaining ability. On the other hand, polygamy benefits most women and hurts most men. I realize most women would not consider it a dating triumph to be some man’s second wife. When I say “benefit,” what I mean is how valuable a mate one can attract. You see, it’s all a question of numbers. With polygamy, low-status men are the worst off. They have to struggle to secure any sort of mate. One of the social problems of polygamous societies is the murderous competition that they create among low-status men (incidentally, they also help explain the appeal of suicide bombing to young Muslim men of low status, since part of their promised reward is a harem of seventy-two virgins in the afterlife). Our founding myths are a testament to the struggle to secure the best females. The epic conflict in Homer’s Iliad is over the possession of a single woman.

For women, though, polygamy