Discardia_ More Life, Less Stuff - Dinah Sanders [43]
Try reading something across the boundaries of your beliefs. C.S. Lewis's The Screwtape Letters and Mere Christianity have something to offer even a diehard atheist. The Selfish Gene by Richard Dawkins, or just about anything by Carl Sagan, can help theists and deists understand the love and passion that the irreligious can bring to the world around them. If those are too big a jump, then read the humorous Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by atheist Douglas Adams, or enjoy Sister Wendy's books and videos on great art of the world. Learn what you can see from a viewpoint to which you’ve previously closed yourself off.
This also goes for politics, of course, but you guessed that, right?
Going in graciously
What about the next social occasion where you need to spend time around your ideological opposites? Rather than wasting a lot of energy building up to an encounter which you expect to be tense, go into it with an open mind and be a bit more kind yourself. Perhaps you and that relative argue every year when you see each other; maybe this time you could avoid it if you don't spend days in advance practicing your arguments in your head.
Be gracious.
Forgive.
If the other person won't melt the ice on their side, give them (and you) some distance and spare yourselves the scene.
Bottom line: Always stay open to the possibility that conflict can be discarded. When it feels like you’re on opposite teams, it’s always worth asking, “How can we both get what we want?” Most games are not zero-sum.
Symptom #16: Haunted by the Black Dog
Solution #16: Depression Is a Liar
[Despair] is marked by a desire to get rid of the self, or put another way, by an unwillingness to become who you fundamentally are.
—Gordon Marino, professor of philosophy
You deserve better
Are you sad? Depressed? That's a tough space to escape. You can't just “make happy” or let that one go so easily. However, there are some good techniques to loosen depression's hold on you. Get active.
Every day, spend at least half an hour walking or gardening or otherwise being aware of the surroundings outside your room and office.
Get involved. Do something regularly to help other people. Volunteer once a month at a soup kitchen or the library. Help a senior or ill person in your neighborhood with errands or groceries. Become aware of the good times. Keep a journal and be sure to write in it when times are good as well as when they're bad. Depression can make it seem like things will be bad from here on out, but depression is a liar. It helps to be able to see your cycles.
If getting up and walking out the door feels as impossible as walking through the wall, bring in a pro and see if your depression is chemical in nature. If you have a physical illness—and that’s what clinical depression is—work with your doctor and supportive friends and family to create a treatment plan just as you would for any other ailment. You deserve not to have to put up with some hormonal imbalance making your time needlessly crappy.
More than that, no one should have to live a needlessly crappy life. Whether driven by your own changes or that in combination with a good prescription, take better care of yourself. You do deserve it. It can get better.
Now has its charms
On a day where the outside world is making you glum, think of the antithesis to today and its weather, and think about why you might be wishing for exactly this. Do something perfectly seasonal. When I contemplated one sad, rainy day, I looked on Twitter and found that the weather was provoking