Discardia_ More Life, Less Stuff - Dinah Sanders [42]
Focus on words and actions, not speculations about motives and intentions. As hip-hop deejay and social commentator Jay Smooth reminded everyone in his magnificent How to Tell People They Sound Racist video, you want to have the “what they did” conversation and not the “what they are” conversation; the latter is too easy for your opponent to derail and escape.
While you’re holding others accountable for what they say and do, keep an eye on yourself. We’ve all got biases. Examine them and see if they’re just a bad habit that got stuck to you. What do you want to unlearn? From whom are you needlessly—and hurtfully to them and to yourself—holding yourself apart? Acknowledge others’ humanity as equal to your own. Turn your feet to journey step by small step to a place where groundless bias isn’t part of how you relate to the world.
Delicious diversity
Today is a good day to look around with fresh eyes at the country where you live and notice the things you love about it. Find common ground with your neighbors and with those people whom you sometimes forget are your neighbors.
For people in the United States, I offer this challenge: Appreciate the differences that make this country so vital and fascinating. That means embracing the true diversity of Bible Belt conservatives and urban liberals; new immigrants and Daughters of the American Revolution; and Spanish-speaking, fifth-generation, Californian farm workers and California’s foreign-born former governor, Arnold Schwarzenegger. It's a wild and frustrating mix, difficult to blend and to understand the other viewpoints, but we can’t pretend that only the parts we like exist and that the rest could be eliminated. Like a person with both pleasing and irritating habits, the pieces make the whole with which we interact. Make the best of it—and I don't mean “lump it.” I mean these words very literally: Make it the best you can make it.
As you open your eyes to the diverse mix that creates your community—any community, even ones that, on the surface, appear homogenous—discard your isolation from those who are different. Many European countries border on as many as 10 or more neighboring countries; the United States only borders on two. No wonder it's hard for average folks in the U.S. to afford a vacation and experience life in another country.
You can visit cultural centers within the nearest big city. Spend a weekend—or at least a whole day—in a place where people mostly speak a different language. Eat new foods, hear new sounds, and learn about the history and traditions of another culture.
Choose where to explore by finding out the other languages on your local election ballot or your library's website. Call the local library and ask about census numbers for languages spoken. Search your city name on the web and the demographics data will probably also give you interesting information (though do consider the source before you assume it's accurate).
There’s a big wide world out there and the boundaries between cultures and nations are dropping all the time. We can think globally and act locally but, thanks to technological changes, we can also take more of our personal world with us around the globe.
Author and futurist Bruce Sterling described his roaming lifestyle like this: “As long as I've got broadband, I'm perfectly at ease with the fact that my position on the planet's surface is arbitrary. It's the nation-state system that is visibly stressed by these changes … Unless I'm physically restrained by some bureaucracy, I don't think I'm going to stop this glocally nomadic life. I live on the Earth. The Earth is a planet. This fact is okay.”
Discard your knee-jerk biases based on philosophical or spiritual affiliation. I know, I know, easier said than done, but see if you can catch yourself in the act of not listening as soon as you know that the person speaking