Empress Orchid - Anchee Min [67]
No response came from the bed.
Chief Eunuch Shim repeated himself.
Snoring was Emperor Hsien Feng’s reply.
With no hesitation, Shim waved and four other eunuchs stepped in. They approached me with the litter. They took me by the arms and placed me on it and carried me outside.
Just as Shim was about to close the door, a sudden wailed “No!” erupted from the room.
Signaling his people to halt, Shim went back. He stuck his head inside the bedroom. “Your Majesty?”
There came no answer.
He hesitated for a moment and then signaled for the eunuchs to free me.
I got off the litter and slipped barefoot back into His Majesty’s room.
Chief Eunuch Shim pulled the door closed.
I was beyond my good senses.
His Majesty cuddled up behind me. The touch of his skin was exciting. He was still sound asleep. I stayed awake for another hour before I drifted off. In my dream I was being swallowed by a dragon with a shark’s mouth. The clouds rolled around me. I struggled to get away from the monster. My shoulders were caught and my chest was pressed. The dragon held me in its claws. “I am potent,” it whispered.
I woke. Emperor Hsien Feng was touching me. I had the sensation I felt when I sat on eggs. His hands were cold but his body warm and his movements gentle. He explored.
I wrapped him like a vine around a tree.
He fumbled and his breath grew thick. He seemed to be surprised by his own excitement. One moment he pushed me away, and the next he threw himself back at me.
I tried to recall the steps I had learned from the House of Lotus. But my mind was a stewing pot where my thoughts turned into mushy beans.
“Take it,” he whispered. “Are you ready?”
“Ready … for what, Your Majesty?”
“Don’t disgust me. Stick up your behind. Aren’t you after my seeds?”
“What does His Majesty expect me to say?”
“Say the lines.”
“Lines? What lines? I have … lost the lines. You don’t want to be bored with something you have heard said hundreds of times.”
“Be quiet for my ancestors’ sake!” Hsien Feng pulled himself away.
I looked at him and found him attractive in his nakedness. I’d better enjoy this, I thought, since I’ll never be allowed to see another naked man in my life.
He asked for my thoughts and I reported honestly.
“What a wicked spirit!” he said slowly. “You are calm and unafraid. You look at the Son of Heaven as if he were a tree.”
I decided not to interrupt.
“Look, I am obligated to produce the bloody sheet. Shim is waiting to collect it. He is waiting to pass it on to the household officials for examination and the record book. Then they will wait for the sign of an heir. They will calculate the dates on their fingers. The doctors will be called to stand by, day and night, for a sign of pregnancy.”
His droning explanation somehow aroused me and I became unafraid.
“You come in armies,” he continued. “You don’t care how I feel. You come to fill up my bedroom and rob me of my essence. You selfish, greedy, bloodsucking female wolves!”
“I would enjoy our business.” Words were pushed out of my chest as if by a strange force.
He was astounded. “You … would?”
“I am not afraid to stick up my behind.” My voice demanded me to release it. “I am here to be your lover. I have paid for this moment dearly. It has not only cost me my ruyi and hairpin, but has also taken me from my family.” My tears came and I had no desire to hold them back. “I haven’t allowed myself to miss my mother and my siblings, but I do now, terribly! I haven’t cried despite the fact that I’ve had to spend my days in loneliness, but I do now. I might be selfish, but I am not greedy or a bloodsucking wolf! I am after nobody’s essence, but I am hungry for affection!”
“You …” He came closer and gently pulled me toward him “These are not the official lines. Who prepared the lines for you? You did? Yourself? Do you have more?”
An urge to perform pleasure rose inside me. “Your Majesty, spare me from answering the question. I was thinking … if you like, there are dances I know.”
Against my