Empress Orchid - Anchee Min [99]
Emperor Hsien Feng was pleased. He praised Nuharoo for her kindness, and then he got up to leave. He avoided looking at me as he bid goodbye. “Good health,” he murmured dryly.
I was unable to hide my sadness. My heart kept searching for an acknowledgment of the warmth we had shared. But it was not there. It was as if we had never known each other. I wished that my belly were not in front of my eyes, not protruding like this, not demanding attention and touch. I wished that I could wipe away the memories.
I watched Emperor Hsien Feng and Nuharoo walking away. I wanted to throw myself at my lover’s feet. I wanted to kiss his feet, and I would beg for love.
An-te-hai came to my side and held me tightly. “The berries are ripening, my lady,” he whispered. “They will be ready soon.”
The branches of the cypresses spread downward like giant fans, blocking the light of the moon. That night a storm came. I heard the branches sweeping and scraping the ground. The next morning An-te-hai told me that red berries were everywhere. “They look like blood-stains,” the eunuch said. “They have covered your garden floor, and some are stuck between the roof tiles.”
I received Little Cloud, a small-eyed and fat-cheeked fifteen-year-old maid. Since I was expected to obey the first wife’s wish, I gave Little Cloud a handsome bonus, which the girl returned with a sweet “Thank you.” I told An-te-hai to keep an eye on her. A few days later she was found spying.
“I caught her!” An-te-hai dragged Little Cloud over to my presence. “This cheap slave was peeking into Your Majesty’s letters!”
Little Cloud denied the accusation. When I threatened to beat her if she didn’t confess, she revealed her temper. Her small eyes sank into her fat face as she yelled and called An-te-hai “You tailless animal!” She then went on to insult me. “My lady entered through the Gate of Celestial Purity when she arrived, and you came through a side door!”
I told An-te-hai to drag the maid out and starve her for three meals.
As if enjoying my rage, Little Cloud continued. “You’d better think about whose dog you are kicking! So what if I have been spying on you? You have been reading court documents instead of embroidery patterns! Are you guilty? Are you afraid? Let me tell you, it is too late to think about bribing me, Lady Yehonala. I shall report everything I have seen to my master. I will be rewarded for my loyalty; you will end up limbless and live in a jar.”
“Whip!” I called. “Punish this girl until she shuts up!”
I never meant to have An-te-hai take my words literally. Unfortunately that was what happened. He and the other eunuchs dragged Little Cloud to the Hall of Punishment. They beat Little Cloud and tried every way to silence her, but the girl was too stubborn.
An hour later An-te-hai came to report that Little Cloud was dead.
“You …” I was shocked. “An-te-hai, I didn’t give you the order to beat her to death!”
“But, my lady, she wouldn’t shut up.”
As the head of the Imperial household, Nuharoo summoned me to appear before her. I hoped I had enough strength to endure what lay ahead. I worried about the child inside me.
Before I had finished changing, a group of eunuchs from the Hall of Punishment stormed into my palace. They wouldn’t say who sent them. They arrested my floor eunuchs and maids and searched through my drawers and closets.
“You’d better send me to inform His Majesty immediately.” An-te-hai helped me into my court robe. “They are going to torment you until the ‘dragon seed’ falls out.”
I could feel my insides contracting. Frightened, I held my belly and told An-te-hai to waste no time. He picked up a washbasin and exited through the back chamber, pretending to fetch water.
I heard a voice outside, calling to hurry me to finish dressing. “Her Majesty the Empress is waiting!” I didn’t know whether they were my eunuchs or the people who had come to wreck my palace.
I took as