Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners [19]
justice of God, and my sinful soul could embrace and kiss each other, through His blood. This was a good day to me; I hope I shall never forget it.
116. At another time, as I sat by the fire in my house, and was musing on my wretchedness, the Lord made that also a precious word unto me, FORASMUCH THEN AS THE CHILDREN ARE PARTAKERS OF FLESH AND BLOOD, HE ALSO HIMSELF LIKEWISE TOOK PART OF THE SAME, THAT THROUGH DEATH HE MIGHT DESTROY HIM THAT HAD THE POWER OF DEATH, THAT IS THE DEVIL; AND DELIVER THOSE WHO THROUGH FEAR OF DEATH, WERE ALL THEIR LIFETIME SUBJECT TO BONDAGE. Heb. ii. 14, 15. I thought that the glory of these words was then so weighty on me, that I was both once and twice ready to swoon as I sate; yet not with grief and trouble, but with solid joy and peace.
117. At this time also I sate under of holy Mr GIFFORD, whose doctrine, by God's grace, was much for my stability. This man made it much his business to deliver the people of God from all those false and unsound tests, that by nature we are prone to. He would bid us take special heed, that we took not up any truth upon trust; as from this, or that, or any other man or men; but to cry mightily to God, that He would convince us of the reality thereof, and set us down therein by His own Spirit in the holy word; FOR, said he, IF YOU DO OTHERWISE, WHEN TEMPTATIONS COME, IF STRONGLY, YOU NOT HAVING RECEIVED THEM WITH EVIDENCE FROM HEAVEN, WILL FIND YOU WANT THAT HELP AND STRENGTH NOW TO RESIST, THAT ONCE YOU THOUGHT YOU HAD.
118. This was as seasonable to my soul, as the former and latter rains in their season (for I had found, and that by sad experience, the truth of these his words: for I had felt NO MAN CAN SAY, especially when tempted by the devil, THAT JESUS CHRIST IS LORD, BUT BY THE HOLY GHOST). Wherefore I found my soul, through grace, very apt to drink in this doctrine, and to incline to pray to God, that in nothing that pertained to God's glory, and my own eternal happiness, He would suffer me to be without the confirmation thereof from heaven; for now I saw clearly, there was an exceeding difference betwixt the notion of the flesh and blood, and the revelations of God in heaven: also a great difference betwixt that faith that is feigned, and according to man's wisdom, and that which comes by a man's being born thereto of God. Matt. xvi. 15; 1 John v. 1.
119. But, oh! now, how was my soul led from truth to truth by God! Even from the birth and cradle of the Son of God, to His accession, and second coming from heaven to judge the world!
120. Truly, I then found, upon this account, the great God was very good unto me; for, to my remembrance, there was not any thing that I then cried unto God to make known, and reveal unto me, but He was pleased to do it for me; I mean, not one part of the gospel of the Lord Jesus, but I was orderly led into it: methought I saw with great evidence, from the relation of the four evangelists, the wonderful work of God, in giving Jesus Christ to save us, from His conception and birth, even to His second coming to judgment: methought I was as if I had seen Him born, as if I had seen Him grow up; as if I had seen Him walk through this world, from the cradle to the cross; to which also, when He came, I saw how gently He gave Himself to be hanged, and nailed on it for my sins and wicked doings. Also as I was musing on this His progress, that dropped on my spirit, HE WAS ORDAINED FOR THE SLAUGHTER. 1 Peter i. 12, 20.
121. When I have considered also the truth of His resurrection, and have remembered that word, TOUCH ME NOT, MARY, etc., I have seen as if He had leaped out of the grave's mouth, for joy that He was risen again, and had got the conquest over our dreadful foes. John xx. 17. I have also in the spirit, seen Him a man, on the right hand of God the Father for me; and have seen the manner of His coming from heaven, to judge the world with glory, and have been confirmed in these things by these scriptures following, Acts i. 9,
116. At another time, as I sat by the fire in my house, and was musing on my wretchedness, the Lord made that also a precious word unto me, FORASMUCH THEN AS THE CHILDREN ARE PARTAKERS OF FLESH AND BLOOD, HE ALSO HIMSELF LIKEWISE TOOK PART OF THE SAME, THAT THROUGH DEATH HE MIGHT DESTROY HIM THAT HAD THE POWER OF DEATH, THAT IS THE DEVIL; AND DELIVER THOSE WHO THROUGH FEAR OF DEATH, WERE ALL THEIR LIFETIME SUBJECT TO BONDAGE. Heb. ii. 14, 15. I thought that the glory of these words was then so weighty on me, that I was both once and twice ready to swoon as I sate; yet not with grief and trouble, but with solid joy and peace.
117. At this time also I sate under of holy Mr GIFFORD, whose doctrine, by God's grace, was much for my stability. This man made it much his business to deliver the people of God from all those false and unsound tests, that by nature we are prone to. He would bid us take special heed, that we took not up any truth upon trust; as from this, or that, or any other man or men; but to cry mightily to God, that He would convince us of the reality thereof, and set us down therein by His own Spirit in the holy word; FOR, said he, IF YOU DO OTHERWISE, WHEN TEMPTATIONS COME, IF STRONGLY, YOU NOT HAVING RECEIVED THEM WITH EVIDENCE FROM HEAVEN, WILL FIND YOU WANT THAT HELP AND STRENGTH NOW TO RESIST, THAT ONCE YOU THOUGHT YOU HAD.
118. This was as seasonable to my soul, as the former and latter rains in their season (for I had found, and that by sad experience, the truth of these his words: for I had felt NO MAN CAN SAY, especially when tempted by the devil, THAT JESUS CHRIST IS LORD, BUT BY THE HOLY GHOST). Wherefore I found my soul, through grace, very apt to drink in this doctrine, and to incline to pray to God, that in nothing that pertained to God's glory, and my own eternal happiness, He would suffer me to be without the confirmation thereof from heaven; for now I saw clearly, there was an exceeding difference betwixt the notion of the flesh and blood, and the revelations of God in heaven: also a great difference betwixt that faith that is feigned, and according to man's wisdom, and that which comes by a man's being born thereto of God. Matt. xvi. 15; 1 John v. 1.
119. But, oh! now, how was my soul led from truth to truth by God! Even from the birth and cradle of the Son of God, to His accession, and second coming from heaven to judge the world!
120. Truly, I then found, upon this account, the great God was very good unto me; for, to my remembrance, there was not any thing that I then cried unto God to make known, and reveal unto me, but He was pleased to do it for me; I mean, not one part of the gospel of the Lord Jesus, but I was orderly led into it: methought I saw with great evidence, from the relation of the four evangelists, the wonderful work of God, in giving Jesus Christ to save us, from His conception and birth, even to His second coming to judgment: methought I was as if I had seen Him born, as if I had seen Him grow up; as if I had seen Him walk through this world, from the cradle to the cross; to which also, when He came, I saw how gently He gave Himself to be hanged, and nailed on it for my sins and wicked doings. Also as I was musing on this His progress, that dropped on my spirit, HE WAS ORDAINED FOR THE SLAUGHTER. 1 Peter i. 12, 20.
121. When I have considered also the truth of His resurrection, and have remembered that word, TOUCH ME NOT, MARY, etc., I have seen as if He had leaped out of the grave's mouth, for joy that He was risen again, and had got the conquest over our dreadful foes. John xx. 17. I have also in the spirit, seen Him a man, on the right hand of God the Father for me; and have seen the manner of His coming from heaven, to judge the world with glory, and have been confirmed in these things by these scriptures following, Acts i. 9,