Half Moon Street - Anne Perry [95]
Mariah was sitting alone in the withdrawing room telling herself that the danger had passed, and she had only done what was necessary, when the door opened and Caroline came in. She looked very pale and there were shadows around her eyes. The pain in her face needed no explanation.
At that moment the old lady would have given all she possessed to have undone yesterday, but she knew nothing could ever be undone. A last thought flickered out somewhere inside her, and the darkness was complete.
“We are not at home,” Caroline said to the maid, somewhere behind her. “Not to anyone. Do you understand?”
“Yes, Mrs. Fielding, not to anyone.”
“Good. Now, do not interrupt us.”
“No, ma’am.”
Caroline closed the door and faced the old lady.
“Now!” she said grimly. “You are going to explain this!” She held out the slightly crumpled letter in her hand.
The old lady stared up at her. There was no yielding in her face, her eyes did not waver, no softening.
“Explain?” she repeated through dry lips.
“Don’t pretend you don’t know,” Caroline said grimly. “Samuel received this letter inviting him to call yesterday. It is a highly suggestive letter, and he came expecting . . . Heaven knows what! Then you sent Joseph to the theatre to fetch Joshua so he would arrive and misread the situation.” She held up the letter. “Someone used my name. That could only have been you.”
Denial sprang to the old lady’s lips, and she saw in Caroline’s face that she would not be believed. There was a kind of finality in the moment. A black void of hate opened up in front of her. There was nothing left to lose now. The pen was not where she had expected it. It was not the past after all, it was the present, the loss now. It was the knowledge of having destroyed it all herself.
“I am waiting!” Caroline said sharply. “This requires an explanation. Why did you send Samuel this letter in my name?”
Could she disclaim any knowledge? Say she sent the letter to prevent Caroline from becoming involved in an affair and ruining her marriage? Would Caroline believe her? No. It was a travesty, and they both knew it.
The ultimate nightmare was real at last. This was the moment when the truth would begin. She might delay it, push it before her in bits and pieces into the future, but in the end it would all be known. It would be clearer to tell it now, like a quick kill. There was nothing left to lose, it was only the manner of it that was in question.
Caroline was still staring at her, implacable.
The old lady took a long, deep breath.
“Yes, I sent him the letter in your name to get him here. I knew he would come, for you . . .”
At any other time Caroline’s blush would have given the old lady satisfaction. Now she barely noticed it.
“I assume you will tell me why,” Caroline said coldly.
“Of course.” The old lady gulped air and felt it painful inside her. “I intended Joshua to find you together and throw him out, and forbid him ever to come here again.”
Caroline sat down as if her legs had given way, her skirts all squashed around her.
“Why? What has he ever done that you should even dislike him, let alone do something . . . so . . .” She was lost for words, and her voice trailed off helplessly. She looked as if all understanding had fled from her.
There was no alternative. Caroline had to know. It would only be harder if she left it. Now was the time. Half a century of secret pain was about to be opened up without comfort or mercy.
“Because he knows. He must!” the old lady said hoarsely. “I thought I couldn’t live with that. Now I am going to have to.”
“Knows?” Caroline shook her head a little. “Knows what? What could he possibly know that would be worth . . . that?”
Finally the nightmare was real, something no longer private. It was