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How to Train a Wild Elephant_ And Other Adventures in Mindfulness - Jan Chozen Bays [33]

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feeling of relief. Our suffering is bound up in objects, in the desire to obtain them, keep them, change them, or get rid of them. Any time we find ourselves holding tightly to objects, whether they are physical objects or mental objects such as thoughts and emotions, we are grasping the seeds of suffering. If we can release that hold, reverse our focus, and become aware of the background of emptiness, of possibilities, we can prevent distress and sorrow from growing within us.

Some Christian mystics call God the Ground of Being. To rest in this ground feels like finding our way back home. This is the awareness we had before our birth and in the few months after we were born, before words, then ideas, and then emotions began to fill and cloud the mind. Meditation and prayer still the mind and bring us back to this original ground.


Final Words: Let the mind become spacious. Do not be distracted or fooled by its content.

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One Bite at a Time

The Exercise: This is a mindfulness practice to do whenever you are eating. After you take a bite, put the spoon or fork back down in the bowl or on the plate. Place your awareness in your mouth until that one bite has been enjoyed and swallowed. Only then pick up the utensil and take another bite. If you are eating with your hands, put the sandwich, apple, or cookie down between bites.

REMINDING YOURSELF

Post notes with “One Bite at a Time” wherever you eat, or an icon of a spoon or fork with the words “Put It Down!”


DISCOVERIES

This is one of the most challenging mindful-eating practices we do at our monastery. In attempting this exercise, most people discover that they have the habit of “layering” bites of food. That is, they put one bite in the mouth, divert their attention away from the mouth as they shovel food onto the fork or spoon for the next bite, then put a second bite in the mouth before the first one is swallowed. Often the hand is hovering in the air, with another bite halfway to the mouth, as the preceding bite is chewed. They discover that as soon as the mind wanders, the hand assumes control again, putting new bites of food in on top of partially processed bites. It is amazing how hard this simple task can be. It takes time, patience, persistence, and a sense of humor to change long-term habits.

The absorption of food can begin in the mouth, if we chew our food well and let it mix with saliva, which contains digestive enzymes. The earlier absorption begins, the earlier the satiation signals are sent out to the brain, and the sooner we feel full. The sooner we feel full, the more appropriate we can be about the amounts of food we serve ourselves and then consume.

Putting down your utensil between bites used to be part of good manners. It counteracts the tendency to wolf down our food. One person exclaimed after trying this task, “I just realized that I never chew my food. I swallow it almost whole, in my haste to get the next bite in!” She had to ask herself, “Why am I in such a rush to get through a meal, when I enjoy eating so much?”


DEEPER LESSONS

This is actually a task about becoming aware of impatience. Eating quickly, layering one bite on top of another, is a specific example of impatience. Doing this task may lead you to watch the arising of impatience in other aspects and occasions in your life. Do you get impatient when you have to wait? We have to ask ourselves, “Why am I in such a rush to get through life, when I want to enjoy it so much?”

Experiencing one bite or one swallow at a time is a way of experiencing one moment at a time. Since we eat or drink at least three times a day, this mindfulness tool gives us several built-in opportunities to bring mindfulness into each day. Eating is naturally pleasurable, but when we eat quickly and without mindfulness, we don’t experience that pleasure. Research shows that, ironically, people eat their favorite foods more quickly than foods they dislike! Binge eaters also report that they keep on eating in an effort to re-create the pleasure of the first bite. Because the taste receptors tire

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