Judy Moody Goes to College - Megan Mcdonald [9]
College was uber-rare. Sick-awesome!
As soon as Judy got home from college, she asked Kate and Richard if she could have a pink mini fridge for her room. They said N-O. Judy called Chloe (for serious) on Kate’s not-candy cell phone.
“They actually think a fridge belongs in the kitchen,” she told Chloe. Old skool.
The very next day, Judy took a long look around her room. It was wearing sadface. Time for a change. She would give her room a makeover — really college it up!
First, Judy piled tons of pillows on the floor. Next, she drew zebra stripes all over her bedspread with a marker. Then Judy hung her paintings on the walls and even on the ceiling using Band-Aids for tape. She saved a place of honor over her bunk bed for Portrait of a Band-Aid-Not-Soup-Can without Shadows, Deluxe Edition.
Rad! All she needed now was a fuzzy, shaggy, hairy rug like Chloe’s. But how to make a boring, old un-fuzzy rug look like a beasty animal with jungle vibes?
She tried dust bunnies from under her bunk bed. She tried lint. She even tried getting Mouse to roll around on her rug to make it nice and cat-hairy.
Judy stood back to admire her new fuzzy animal rug. It did not look like a tiger. It did not have jungle vibes. It looked like a giant hair ball. And to make matters worse, Kate made Judy vacuum it for no allowance.
Judy sat on her bottom bunk to think. Mouse was chasing a ball of yarn. A ball of orange yarn. A ball of fuzzy, hairy yarn. “Mouse, give me that!” said Judy, chasing her around the room on hands and knees, knocking over stacks of pillows and books and a trash can.
“What’s going on?” Stink asked. “What are you doing?”
“What’s it look like I’m doing?” said Judy.
“Chasing the cat,” said Stink. “But why are you chasing the cat?”
“To get the yarn,” said Judy.
“But why do you want the yarn?” asked Stink.
“To cut it into a million little pieces.”
“But why are you gonna cut it into a million pieces?” Stink asked.
“To make a fuzzy orange rug. What do you think? I’m giving my room a hairy-rug makeover.”
“Mo-om!” Stink yelled. “Judy’s chasing the cat to get the yarn to cut it into a million pieces to make a fuzzy rug to give her room a hairy-rug makeover!”
What an NCP.
After the hairy-rug makeover experiment, Judy went looking for a peaceful mood. “Peace out!” she called to anybody who was listening. “I’m going out back in the tent!”
The Toad Pee Club tent was like the Attitude Tent without the attitude. Judy climbed inside, where it was secret and quiet, like the peace tents at college. She got down on her hands and knees. Mouse stood still on all fours, watching. Judy arched her back. Mouse arched her back. Judy breathed in and out. Mouse breathed in and out.
Judy gazed at her navel. She tried to fill herself up with peace.
“What in the world . . . ?” said Stink, barging into the tent.
“Stink, you’re wrecking my peace.”
“I’m wrecking your what?”
“It’s yoga,” said Judy. “Mouse and I are doing the cat pose.”
“Mouse looks like a cat,” said Stink, “but you just look like someone staring at her belly button upside down.”
“Try it,” said Judy. “I learned it at college.”
“I can stare at my belly button sitting up,” said Stink, “without going to college. Besides, staring at your belly button is about as much fun as watching paint dry.”
“They do that at college, too,” said Judy.
“Bor-ing,” said Stink.
“Hey, what’s up?” asked Rocky and Frank, barging into the tent with their big boy-feet.
“Oh, yeah,” said Stink. “I came to tell you that Rocky and Frank were coming over.”
“Is this an upside-down meeting of the Toad Pee Club?”
“It’s yogurt,” said Stink. “She learned it at college.”
“Yo-ga,” said Judy. “Not yogurt. It’s like an exercise, not a snack food.” Clearly Stink had never read the Y-for-Yoga encyclopedia.
“Show us,” said Frank.
Judy showed them how to arch like a cat. She showed them how to bend in half like a chair, reach to the sky like a warrior, and stand on one leg like a tree. “Now close your eyes, but don’t think.”
“I can’t not think,” said Frank. “I keep