Junie B. Jones Has a Peep in Her Pocket - Barbara Park [5]
I did my shoulders up and down.
“I don’t know. Maybe,” I said.
“And also, the special farm hand gets to be the very first person to sit on the tractor,” said Farmer Flores. “Does that sound like fun to you?”
I sighed very big.
“I don’t know. Maybe,” I said.
“Oh,” he said. “But here’s the most important job of all. The special farm hand gets to help me keep all the children in order.”
Just then, my mouth came all the way open!
“In order?” I asked very thrilled. “You mean I get to order the other children around?”
Farmer Flores rubbed his chin. “Well, yes. I suppose you could put it that way,” he said.
I quick grabbed my backpack.
“Well, then what are we waiting for, Farmer?” I said.
After that, I runned off the bus speedy fast. And I clapped my hands real loud.
“ALL RIGHT, PEOPLE. GET IN LINE. FARMER FLORES IS GOING TO SHOW US AROUND! AND HE DOESN’T HAVE ALL DAY, FOLKS!”
Pretty soon, Farmer Flores and Mrs. came off the bus, too.
They told the children to please hold hands like the buddy system.
“YOU HEARD THEM, PEOPLE!” I hollered. “THE BUDDY SYSTEM! WE WILL BE USING THE BUDDY SYSTEM TODAY!”
All of a sudden, Mrs. bended down next to my ear.
“Helping Farmer Flores does not mean being rude, Junie B.,” she said. “I want you to be helpful and nice.”
“But I am being helpful and nice,” I said. “’Cause I didn’t even tell anyone to shut up yet.”
Just then, I skipped to the end of the line and checked on Paulie Allen Puffer and Jim.
“I’ve got my eye on you two clowns,” I said very helpful and nice.
Jim cockle-doodly-dooed at me again.
“Yeah, only too bad for you, Jim,” I said. “’Cause I already looked around this place for roosters. And I didn’t even see one of those meanie guys. So, ha!”
After that, I quick skipped back to the front of the line. And me and Farmer led the children to the pasture.
Pasture is the farm word for big grass and a fence.
Only wait till you hear this! There were four horses and two ponies in that pasture!
And I did not even run from them!
“ATTENTION, PEOPLE! ATTENTION!” I hollered. “DO NOT BE AFRAID OF THE HORSES AND PONIES. JUST STAND VERY STILL AND THEY WILL NOT ATTACK YOU…PROBABLY.”
I thought for a second.
“ALSO, DO NOT FEED THEM CHEESE POPCORN,” I said.
I looked at Farmer. “I learned that from the zoo,” I said.
After that, Farmer held my hand. And we led the children to the barn.
The barn is where the cows get milked.
All of Room Nine held their noses in that place. ’Cause barns smell like stink and hay.
Farmer Flores told us all about milking cows. He showed us the machines that hook up to the cows. Plus also, we saw big giant cans that hold the milk.
After he got done, he asked if we had questions.
I raised my hand.
“If you breathe stink air into your body, does it make your insides smell like stink air, too?”
Farmer didn’t answer me. Only I don’t know why. ’Cause that is a troubling question, I tell you.
After that, he took my hand again. And we took the children to another part of the barn.
There was a black-and-white cow there. Farmer showed us how to milk her with a milking machine.
That is called a demo cow, I believe.
After that, Farmer Flores was finished talking about cows.
“Okay, boys and girls. Let’s go back outside and visit some of the other animals,” he said.
Just then, I got a little nervous inside. On account of what if he was taking us to see the rooster?
I walked outside very careful.
Only good news! Farmer Flores took us right to pigs in a pen. And after that, we saw goats and lambs. And I petted a lamb on her fuzzy head!
And that is not even the bestest part! On account of pretty soon, Mrs. Farmer Flores drove up on a shiny red tractor! And I was the first one to get to sit up there with her!
I quick gave Mrs. my camera.
“Take my picture, please! Take my picture up here on this tractor!”
I smiled real big for her.
Mrs. clicked me.
“That will be a beaut!” I said.
After that, I got down from the tractor. And I took a cow picture. And a pig picture. And a lamb picture!