Lies & the Lying Liars Who Tell Them_ A Fair & Balanced Look at the Right - Al Franken [21]
AL: So more sheer joy than insolent pleasure?
DAN: Yeah. That’s about right. By the way, we have a bet here in the newsroom about what exactly is wrong with Ann Coulter.
AL: I can’t help you out. I don’t claim to understand it. Anyway, thanks, Dan.
DAN: Sure, Al.
That’s one of the nice things about this job. Making contact with fellow liberals and taking insolent pleasure and/or experiencing the sheer joy of lying to you, our readers. I’d made a friend for life.
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Conclusion: A Lesson Learned
As the application of TeamFranken’s Hypothetical Liberal Media Paradigm Matrix amply demonstrates, there is no liberal bias in the media when it comes to politics. What a pity. I think a little liberal bias would make me feel better about all three branches of the government being controlled by the right.
Let’s review.
Politics—no liberal bias
Social issues—trivial liberal bias (no mainstream journalist has ever bombed an abortion clinic)
Sports—massive, but inconsequential, conservative bias.1
The Funnies—funny bias, or in the case of Family Circus, funny and heartwarming bias
Am I overlooking anything important? I guess I’m done. That was easy. My second shortest book ever.
I guess I’ll just check my stock portfolio. Money is so important to me.
Wait! That’s it! Money! That’s what I was forgetting. Economic issues. Nuts. I’m not finished, after all. Now I wish I hadn’t dismissed TeamFranken. Well, I’ll just have to get them back and assign them to do a massive amount of research on how the media covers economic issues, while I figure out some way to make that interesting.
Wait! I’ve got an idea . . .
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Five Get-Rich-Quick Tips the Wall Street Fat Cats Don’t Want You to Know
TIP #1—Never option stock in a blue chip where the market cap is twenty times the I made this all up.
Economic issues can seem dry and technical for the average person. In fact, there is only one type of economic story that has proven to be universally captivating year after year. I am speaking, of course, of stories about lottery winners: where they bought their winning ticket; where they were when they heard that they had won; whether they plan to keep their job; and what kind of car they plan to buy.
I’ll admit that stories about the unemployment rate, our national debt, and the balance of trade can seem a bit dry compared to a lottery winner. But look at it this way. A story about the unemployment rate is a story about whether you have a job. A story about the national debt is a story about whether or not you can afford the interest payments on your house. And that story about the balance of trade? Okay, that is a little dry.
So economic issues are just as important as stories about politics, social issues, and Whitney Houston. And the fact is the mainstream media has a bona fide conservative bias when it comes to economic issues.
Don’t take my word for it. Because I sometimes include jokes in the things I write, my credibility can be suspect, compared to someone without a sense of humor, like Bernie Goldberg. Check out this 1998 study on the economic views of Washington journalists conducted by Dr. David Croteau of Virginia Commonwealth University.1
The survey found that while journalists consider themselves slightly to the left on social issues, they don’t think they’re liberal on economic issues. In fact, almost twice as many say they’re to the right on economic issues as say they’re to the left. And when it comes to Social Security, Medicare, free trade, corporate power, taxes, and health care, the study shows that journalists are significantly to the right of the general public.
Charts bore me. At least, regular charts bore me. That’s why I’ve decided to pep this one up a little bit with some gentle humor (See next page).
So journalists are economically conservative. But this makes sense, given their position in society. Journalists have it made. Their lives are trouble-free. If you’ve ever met a journalist, you’ll know what I mean. They’re the happiest