Life and Laughing_ My Story - Michael McIntyre [87]
My daydream was coming to life, although an aspect of this meeting that hadn’t appeared in my fantasizing was that my sleeve then became caught on his jacket. I tugged at it, but it wouldn’t free itself. I didn’t want to spoil this moment by pointing out this fabric faux pas.
‘You were very good,’ Don said. ‘How long have you been going?’
‘This is my sixth gig,’ I said. He was suitably impressed. I subtly fiddled with my sleeve, but it remained caught.
‘Follow me, we’ll book you back in for a ten-minute spot.’
Don walked out of the dressing room and I followed, although in truth I had no choice as we were connected to each other. We walked through the audience who were milling about in the interval; people were patting me on the back and congratulating me. I should have been lapping up this newfound adoration, but I was mainly concerned with the issue at hand, or rather sleeve. He took me to his little office at the back of the club.
‘Take a seat,’ Don said, opening up his big red diary in his office. He pencilled in another gig for two weeks’ time, we shook hands and then we both left the office. This was my moment to leave and enjoy my wonderful night, one of the best nights of my life, the moment to find my sister and celebrate, to watch the rest of the show and hang out with the other comics. But I was physically attached to Don Ward.
Don walked back towards the dressing room, and I was forced to go with him. He looked at me, puzzled as to my continued presence. He then stopped to chat with some staff, and I remained by his side. I continued tugging at my sleeve, but it was no use. I started to panic that I was going to ruin everything. He gave me a look that confirmed my fears that my enforced hanging around was starting to annoy him. He then walked around the club seemingly trying to shake me off. The show restarted, he stood at the back to watch with me uncomfortably close by his side.
‘You can go, you know,’ Don eventually said with more than a hint of annoyance.
I gave my sleeve a final yank and thankfully freed myself from The Don. I think I just about got away with it. Don thought I was funny, a bit clingy maybe, but funny. I had a booking for two weeks’ time. I would play the Comedy Store twice in a fortnight, I was up and running, I felt like a com-edian for the first time.
The saying goes, ‘You’re only as good as your last gig.’ Well, in my mind that meant I was now a sensation. My first success in stand-up went straight to my head. I informed everyone I met that I was a comedian. I recounted the story over and over again: ‘… and then they called back and said we’ve got a spot tonight … and I was like … TONIGHT? OK, I’ll do it …’ Another thing I did in my overexcitement was to invite everybody I knew to come to the Comedy Store in a fortnight to witness at first hand my rising stardom.
The person I most wanted to watch me at the Comedy Store was Kitty. I was convinced that the dream I had had was about to come true, in just two weeks. All I had to do was repeat my performance with her in the audience, make sure my clothing didn’t become attached to Don Ward and she would fall helplessly in love with me.
The only problem was that Kitty said she wasn’t available on the night of my Comedy Store booking. Not available? My dream is coming true here and she’s unavailable. It transpired that the news was even worse than that. She was going out with somebody else that night, this other guy, the ‘it’s complicated’ one. I couldn’t believe it. I knew she was seeing someone, but I also knew that we were talking on the phone every day and when she wasn’t with him she was with me. This was my big night, she should be there for me even if we were ‘just good friends’. But I had to face the reality that she was more than ‘just good friends’ with ‘it’s complicated’ guy, and when it came down to it, she chose him. When I put this to her, she denied it and said it was just due to timing, this was a longstanding arrangement.
I was starting to lose my ‘playing it cool’ strategy. ‘Just cancel him,