Lion's Bride - Iris Johansen [122]
“I find it strange that you’d work so hard to save a man you hate.” He paused. “You did say you had not forgiven me?”
“And it’s true. What you did was unforgivable.” She ran her hands through her damp hair to aid it in drying. “But you saved my life. I couldn’t let you die.”
“Why won’t you look at me?”
“You’re not overpleasant to look upon. You have four days’ growth on your cheeks.”
His hand involuntarily lifted to his rough cheek. “That’s not the reason.”
“That’s all the reason you’ll get from me.”
He was silent a moment, watching her. He said in a low voice, “Could you not leave your hair down? I’ve not seen it unbound for a long time.”
Since the night Selene had come to Dundragon. It seemed a century ago. She had a sudden vivid memory of writhing under him, making soft, frantic cries. His hands in her tresses holding her still as his hips drove forward, again and again, filling her, stretching her until she could—
She quickly drew her hair over her shoulder and began to braid it.
He said wearily, “I shouldn’t have mentioned it.” He closed his eyes. “I should have known you’d not give me that pleasure. It seemed a little thing….”
It was not a little thing. The memory had brought to life that part of her she had buried for the last two years. She would not be able to look at him now without remembering pleasure.
And wanting it again.
Not now. Not until she could come to terms with this loving. Everything was happening too fast. She already felt too weak and needy; taking him into her body would only make it worse.
He was asleep again. Dear God, his big body looked helpless lying there. No, not completely helpless. She could already see the faint signs of returning strength. Soon he would be himself again, strong, stubborn, willful, carving his way through life, sure that only his path was best. She would have to be wary every moment if she was to hold her own.
But that moment was not now. She slowly crossed the clearing and lay down close to him, savoring his nearness. If he woke, she could use his weakness as excuse.
She cuddled closer, and a warm sweetness flowed through her. This was good. She did not have to worry about either yielding or holding herself aloof. She could lie here and know that, for this moment, it was safe to let herself love him.
She woke in the middle of the night to see him staring down at her with wonder.
“Thea?”
She was too vulnerable, too full of love. She should move away from him. She should close her eyes so that he could not see.
She did not want to close her eyes. She wanted to keep on looking at him forever.
“Why are you afraid?” he whispered. “I’ve been feeling your fear since I came back to my senses.”
She was afraid she loved him too much, afraid she would give him everything and have nothing left for herself. She said shakily, “You’re still out of your senses, if you think I fear you. I don’t—”
“Stop.” His finger gently touched her eyelash. “There’s something here, something I can almost see, if you’d only stop blistering me with words.”
She did not want him to see. Not yet. She must be more sure of herself before she let him be sure of her.
She shut her eyes. “You won’t hear me blister you with words if you don’t talk and disturb my sleep.” She could feel his gaze on her face for another moment before he settled down beside her. “Why did you lie with me?”
“To keep you warm. You must not get a chill. I’ll leave if you like.”
“No, stay.” Then he repeated in a low tone, “Stay, Thea.”
Ware straightened in the saddle. “Hand me my helmet.”
Thea shook her head. “It’s too heavy. I won’t have that metal pressing on the wound.”
“You’d rather have my head split open by one of Sinan’s men. Hand me my helmet.”
Thea ignored him. “Get our horses, Selene.”
Ware shook his head. “You’ll stay here and wait until I return.”
“We go to Maysef.” Selene returned with the horses from the trees, and Thea