Meandering Mind - Eva Dillner [45]
From Social Democrats to Kalki
In the Swedish language, the word empowerment does not exist. The societal structure is based on social democracy, where the government is assumed to know best, and it's practically impossible to make your own decisions when dealing with the state provided services. One friend describes it as either something is mandatory or it's forbidden. Swedes love authority and to be told what to do. It's like the government is one big parent and the population is made up of little children, who can't think for themselves.
So it's not surprising that the latest Indian guru, Kalki, has gathered such an enormous following here. The Swede is so used to getting the answer from an authority, that the very notion that the answer lies within, that you can have your own connection to God, does not compute. So instead of living your life according to the dictates of a political party, you switch allegiance and follow a guru. I have no opinion on the spiritual teachings of Kalki. I believe in listening to and reading from many sources, then retaining what rings true in my heart.
I don't believe we need an interpreter, or intermediary, to tell us what to do. I like to do my own thinking. It's one thing to listen to different philosophers, it's another to give away your power to them. And it's so easy to do. You take a class, listen to a speaker, and get enthused. It's so easy to swallow it all hook, line and sinker, without screening the whole rote of the message. If you find yourself quoting some master or teacher, stop and ask yourself, “do I know this to be true from my own experience, or am I simply parroting what I‚Äòve been taught?” It's so easy to become a parrot, I know, I've been there lots of times. Which is why I'm making such a point of it here. You need to find your own truth and stand on your own two feet in order to fulfill your mission on earth. As long as you're parroting someone else's truth, you aren't really free.
I've known many people who belong to “guru” type organizations, like Osho, Eckankar and SRF (which I lightheartedly refer to as the Yogananda Club). My friends have willingly shared their beliefs and described what their organizations are all about, but I've never felt pressured to join. I've not felt like they were trying to sell me anything. We were simply exchanging different views and possibilities. There is a different dynamic with the disciples of Kalki that I've met. It may simply be over enthusiasm on their part in the newness. However, the unstatistical sampling I'm referring to have been intent on selling me on their religion. Wanting to give me deeksha (aka diksha), wanting me to come to the satsangs and so on. Repeatedly asking me even after I've clearly stated I'm not interested.
One of my pet peeves is someone trying to convince me after I've said no. I respect your opinion and your right to be different from me, so please respect my no when I say it. I shouldn't have to repeat it over and over. Do you think you can wear me down, like water on a rock? That if you pester me long enough I will come around? Perhaps pausing and examining your deeper motivations would do you a world of good?
Unequal relationships
The traditional way of looking at relationships like:
client – therapist
disciple – guru
pupil – teacher
child – parent
lover – healer
implies that one is in authority, has more power or knowledge, than the other.
Let me illustrate how the inequality works. In the client – therapist dynamic, you need the therapist to get your fix. The therapist is there to guide you and help you. There is much in the training of therapists that contribute to this distancing, keeping control, not letting the client see you as a person. There is a belief that if the client sees you at a course going through your own process, they can lose faith in your ability. It would take you off their pedestal, so to speak.
With the disciple – guru, it's the guru who has the power and the information. The disciple is expected to be obedient and faithfully carry out