Meandering Mind - Eva Dillner [6]
Love isn't some limited quantity. It's unlimited. I love all my friends in a different way. The more we can love ourselves, the more we are free to love one another. A parent's love for a child is different than brother-sister love or romantic love. The love in marriage may be quite different than a brief love affair, but it's all about love.
Take a look at your rulebook. What is allowed? What is crazy? What is not allowed? What is not permitted? Who decides? Why do you have these rules? What is the purpose of your rules? What would happen if you broke your rules, or changed them?
One of the concepts I am exploring in this book is that we cause a lot of problems in relationships and business by trying to pound each other into predetermined roles, instead of exploring who we really are. If we could focus on discovering our respective potentials, then look at where we can intersect we would be miles ahead. The trick then is letting go of the rest. Square pegs and round holes are only imaginary boundaries, mere constructs of our mental prisons.
But how do you go about getting to know each other and discovering how and where you are meant to intersect? Well, I had the opportunity to test part of my theory on a man I met. Here is an email I sent him on this very subject:
Hello,
Yesterday I took quite a tumble, didn't realize there was black ice under the snow I was walking on - and landed flat on my back. Like “Bambi on ice,” if you've seen the Disney movie. Needless to say it shook me up, amazingly enough I didn't break anything and walked away without a bruise. I have a friend who does this on a regular basis, her helpers make her tumble or fall but in the process they open her up to another way to see the world. I feel like I had a chiropractic adjustment courtesy of my helpers, angels or guides, or whatever you want to call them.
Last night I dreamt a lot and went off to tropical paradises and islands and God knows what. I woke up with the certainty it's time to revisit Tenerife. When I was there a few years ago I fell in love with it and was all ready to move there to the north side, Puerto de la Cruz - but all of a sudden the universe put a stop to that. At the time I was training to become an instructor in Shen therapy, that organization fell apart, my heart wasn't in teaching therapy and then I started writing books...
I suppose this is where you come in ... you may wonder where you fit in ... so do I.
Ever since I met you, I've wondered why you are in my life. At first I wanted to slot you in, define it, my mind wanted to know. I could see you as a friend, a lover, a relationship, a colleague, someone to do therapy with etc. You could potentially fill a lot of roles, none or some or a combination?????
My Higher Self simply said - be present - and see what happens. Instead of trying to define life, just let it happen, you don't need to analyze or understand or define. Just explore the present. Be true to yourself and communicate from that place.
I still don't know why you are in my life. All I can say is I am curious, I like talking to you and sure there is a physical attraction but maybe that isn't what this is about. From our chats I know you too have had lots of experience being the “pleasure source.” Of the many men I've been with there haven't been many that have been interested in knowing who I really was, and truthfully I may not have let them past my defenses. I don't know if I'm making much sense here. I've been thinking a lot about how difficult it can be to get beyond what we imagine the other person really is about. My friend and I have had lots of dialogue on this - men fall in love with her and want to take care of her, but they don't really see her. At least when I was younger, men would want to have sex with me, but didn't really see me. I don't know if this is true for you, but I can imagine that women would want you, but have not a clue who you really are.
Anyhow, I decided I need to take a trip to Tenerife.