Naamah's Kiss - Jacqueline Carey [172]
The cycle was eternal.
The cycle was unchanging.
I found a point of stillness I didn't want to leave.
"Enough." Master Lo Feng leaned over in the saddle to touch my arm. We were approaching a town and it was late, later than I would have guessed. The sun was dwindling on the horizon. "Fire and Air can wait. You are a good student, Moirin."
"For a stupid girl," Bao added.
"Bao!" Master Lo chided him in Ch'in; Bao retorted in aggrieved tones. I wavered in the saddle, wanting only to sleep now. We entered the town and accommodations were arranged. Our escort would camp on the outskirts, while I was to have a room of my own at the inn, as were Master Lo Feng and Bao.
We ate lamb stew spiced with mint in the common room together. It was very good and I was hungrier than I knew. The serving lass kept stealing curious glances at us. To be sure, we made a peculiar trio.
"Why she stare?" Bao complained. "I grow two heads?"
"Maybe she likes you," I suggested wearily.
"You think?" He looked interested.
"No," I said. "I think she stares because she's never seen anything quite like the three of us before."
His face darkened. "You think no stupid D'Angeline girl can like me?"
"No!" I sighed. "I didn't mean it like that. Actually…" A memory flashed behind my eyes, and I felt myself flush. I'd pictured Bao's face when Raphael made love to me the night of the first summoning largely against my wishes. Of course, I'd pictured Jehanne's too—and the spirit Valac's. But Bao's had been the last. "Ah… it might help if you'd stop referring to us as stupid girls."
Bao looked smug. "Why you turn red? You like me?"
"Not at the moment," I muttered.
He laughed. "Uh-huh! I save your life. Big hero. You wait, you fall in love. Forget all about the White Queen."
"Aren't you some sort of monk in training?" I asked. "I thought you took a vow of celibacy."
"Vow of what?"
"No…" Unsure of his vocabulary, I made a lewd gesture he'd used long ago.
"No!" Bao's eyes widened. "Where you get that idea? I am Master Lo's magpie. No monk."
"Oh." I felt foolish.
"Stu—"
"Bao." Master Lo Feng raised one finger. "In meditation, go deep into the heart. In dealing with others, be gentle and kind. In speech, be true."
"Yes, Master." He accepted the reprimand. "D'Angeline people too proud for they own good," he said eventually. "They think they better than everyone. They not see Master Lo is great man. I think is stupid. Maybe you not so much that way. You make some stupid choices, though, and say some stupid things. But maybe you not so stupid, really."
"You're too kind," I commented.
He shrugged. "True or not?"
"True," I said ruefully. "But if you'd care to be gentle and kind, I'd thank you for not making me think this was one of my more stupid choices." I extended my hand across the table to him. "Can we not agree to be friends for the duration of this journey?"
"Friends." Bao echoed the word, looking dubious.
I nodded.
"All right, sure." Bao clasped my hand, his grip strong, sinewy, and callused. He frowned briefly at our clasped hands, then looked unexpectedly cheerful, grinning at me. "Until you fall crazy in love with me, not-so-stupid girl."
I laughed. "We'll see."
It lightened my heart a little, and Master Lo Feng seemed to approve. But alone in my bedchamber, I felt the weight and enormity of the decision I'd made come back to rest on my shoulders. My chamber was stark and barren. For the first time in a long while, I felt restless and confined behind walls of man-made stone.
I missed my enchanted bower.
I missed Jehanne.
I fished her gift out of my purse and opened the silk pouch to find a small, stoppered bottle of cut crystal. I laughed softly to myself and pulled out the stopper. The scent of Jehanne's intoxicating perfume filled the air. It wasn't the same as when she wore it—but it was still nice, so nice.
I tilted the bottle and wetted one fingertip, then touched it to the hollow of my throat. There, the scent breathed outward,